vile

I'm in a miserable mood. Everyone seems to be happier and more fortunate than me.
Now I am well aware that this is total crap, but if I see someone else getting on with their lives and being remotely happy, this veil comes over my brain and the evil jealousy emerges.
Now you aren't telling me that's the reaction of a decent lovely person. so I must be vile.
Now what am I going to do about this vileness?
If I had money, I'd give to charity to purge my soul of the need for greed.
If I had energy I'd go working in my spare time for some charity to keep my vile soul too busy to be vile.
If I was intelligent, I wouldn't consider myself vile. Just challenged and face the challenge head on.
What the feck am I talking about?
I am a bit vile though, not sure which bit but maybe I can cut it out with me Stanley Knife tomorrow night.