Trin at her crappest.

Oh Fuck. Just when you think it's safe to go into the water....
I'm not having a good day at all. It took me 90 minutes to drive to work. To drive across the city. FFS I'd have got to bloody Heathrow quicker. And that started my day off great.
I got to work to find the Doctor on duty is the jumped up little Elf I HATE. Within 20 seconds I was livid. The Doctor disappeared and left people to be seen, didn't answer her bleep and I felt my head begin to burst.
It was like poison entering my body and seeping into every cell.
It was busy, I worked hard but if I stopped this feeling of 'in a minute I'm going to freak' enveloped me.
Then I went home.... Well the car parking situation is still dire. I had to move the car at 13.30 into an ambulance bay. Fecking ridiculous.
I left work at 3pm. I got home at 4.10. Road works at every turning. Everything moving like snails.
So I made dinner and then Danielle announces that there's some presentation of the aims of year 7 at school. 5.30 - 7pm.
At this point my coping mode lost it's circuitry and I burst into tears... So she's gone on her own (with her friends parents) I'm home feeling like a complete and utter failure as a parent... Fuck me, if I had a partner they could have gone. But oh no.. Not Trin. She had to be a completely hopeless wife and now she hasn't got a husband. Everything has to be done alone in my world.
And I have DIY for cretins and I have to go. Because If I don't go the feeling of letting myself down will overwhelm me. I made a commitment to do it and need to kick the shit out and stop feeling so damn sorry for myself.
FFS.
I'm not a good Mother am I?
The one thing I should try hardest at and be good at, fails me everytime. And it's always Danz. Abby just demands and gets. Danz is too compliant.
BTW Abby had the day off school today. Tummy Ache. I'm thinking of removing her tummy surgically.
I have a Stanley knife.