ward off evil birds

We had CD:UK on this morning. Damn shame Dick and Dom have vacated da bungalow. Mylene Klass presenting... Actually I don't find her as annoying as some presenters... AKA Fearne Cotton.
But that twat from X Factor Shayne Ward was on with his new tune.
I cannot begin to describe just how awful it is. Like some very bad stomach cramp inducing Westlife song. With lots of close ups of his wistful eye expressions and ruby red lips c/o Max Factor.
After 30 seconds of the song my head hurt... It was so high pitched.
Come back Daniel Bedingfield, I apologise for all those evil thoughts towards you.
It was truly a nausea inducing moment.
Then we get to see the 'star' interviewed by the audience.
You reckon they test the audience's IQ before they're allowed in?
Anyone over 45 and liable to start actual thought process is banned?
The first question... A gooey eyed teenager... About 16...
"If you were a pigeon... Who would you poo on?"
/rolls eyes and switches over.
(my only hope is he gets the first case of bird flu UK stylee)