Fleur

I feel so much better now. I made myself go out. I drew 40 quid from the bank and spent ten on fruit and essentials I forgot yesterday. I spent ages looking at the flowers. The local shopping area is a dump. Of about 40 shops only 4 are open. 2 supermarkets and 2 pound come fruit and veg cum flower shops. But they sell the most gorgeous flowers both cut and bedding plants and really cheap. People round here wouldn't pay if it wasn't cheap. I met the guy who grows them in one shop. He gave me a bit of plant advice. His bedding plants are so pretty and fresh and vibrant. The sun was shining and warm on my face and for the first time today I thawed out and felt human again. I can't wait till next month and I can get out into my garden again and make it pretty. I love looking out on it and knowing I did it all on my own. Maybe I can get RT to come over and paint me something warm on the walls like the sun. I'd really like that. Did you know she is the most beautiful artist. I saw some pictures she drew and they made me feel so emotional in their depth and detail. Anyways thanks for listening (or rather reading you lot) I never promised you a rose garden. There's got to be a little rain sometimes. Name that song .