Tuesday and 5 days to go.

I'm mad. The postman tried to deliver a parcel yesterday but we were out. He left one of his stupid cards. Now it usually takes 48 hours for a parcel to reach the depot again but the card stated that I could collect it immediately. Well it is Christmas, so off I trekked this morning.The bloody place is only open from 6am to 11am anyways... Stupid. I'm working the next three mornings and I had no desire to stand in that huge queue on Christmas Eve Morning. It's bloody miles away as well. The traffic was hideous this morning and there was a nasty accident on one of the roads with a woman laid out on the road with paramedics working on her.
I queued up behind the great unwashed and finally got served, to find my parcel wasn't there at all. I was not best pleased. Gits.

So I went walking through the Bedminster shops for an hour. I wanted a Christmas Table Cloth. Bedminster is lovingly known as Beirut by all who sail in her. It's a chavvy shopping area, with the most diverse group of shoppers ever. Mostly psychiatric cases who live in homes along Coronation Road. Mingled with the very elderly who shop with their baskets on wheels and zimmer frames.
I felt a bit sad, because my Nan used to shop there twice a week and each shop I looked in, I felt sure I could see her bustling around trying to pick out the perfect gift for us kids.
I went into Wilkinsons. They were playing the most dreadful Christmas compilation tape ever. "The weeeaathhherrrr outttttsiidddeee iiiissssss frigghtfuulllllll"
I could feel the hairs go up on my arms and the need to leave the shop envelop me. On the way out I bumped into a silly cow coming out the IN door. She'd lit up a fag and was taking the first puff and exhale right into my face. I was bloody annoyed. I hate smokers so much. But mostly inconsiderate smokers. Those who cannot possibly wait until they've left the shop to light up. Why? Why is it so difficult to wait. Beirut was full of smokers, coughing and spitting in the gutter.
I found a couple of fabric placemats in the Chinese shop that weren't too hideous. On the way out I spotted some "Exquisite" Ashtrays and an ashtray with 2008 marked on it. Hmmmm.

There's a shop called 'Aladdins Cave' that would make The Genie jump back in his magic lamp in horror. Full of scary dolls with evil faces and Garish decorations and lights. I nipped in just to see and was wading through the piles of paper plates and napkins when something behind me made me jump. A 6 foot psychotic looking Santa with Murder on his mind began to sing 'Jingle Bells' and move from side to side. A bargain at 80 quid. As he moved he made this mechanical plastic sound. It was the most scary thing I've seen since The Grudge. People don't really buy that crap do they?