Saturday, September 24, 2005

sleeping unquietly

Last night I was woken up by knocking. I woke up and froze. Someone was banging on the door. I looked at the clock and it was 1.30 am.
Worried it was my neighbour in trouble I stood at the top of the stairs and shouted down
"Who is it?"
It was one of Abby's mates.
I don't like opening the door at night, it's not exactly safe round these parts at night. The police helicopter was up all night and I could hear sirens. We have stabbings and murders like all the best council estates do.
I opened the door and she came in. Drunk as a Lord, and rather incoherent. She wanted to use the toilet. So I let her, then she hugged me profusely and apologised and went back out in the dark, she said she had some lads waiting for her round the corner.
Then I couldn't sleep. I kept thinking I heard the door knock.
Then I kept worrying about her. I had a dream she'd been murdered and I was so guilty at being the one who let her back out in the dark at 2am.
And I felt myself very lucky to have a daughter who simply wouldn't do that to me, because she respects me and loves me.
Now I'm off to work.
(I might fit a keychain tomorrow with new drill)

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