note to self

My head's not right. Ignore most content from forthwith until said head gets screwed back on properly.
I need to
Take my pills. Keep forgetting.
Take control.
Sleep More
and stop letting that sodding fat cat out of the front door.
There's a bloody cat flap Bailey.

There's a lot of love inside here you know. Inside of me. There's a lot of good stuff to give. I know it. It's not all bad. I do know it.

"A warning sign,
I missed the good part then I realized,
I started looking and the bubble burst.
I started looking for excuses.

Come on in,
I've gotta tell you what state I'm in,
I've gotta tell you in my loudest tones,
That I started looking for a warning sign.

When the truth is,
I miss you.
Yeah the truth is,
That I miss you so.**"
Coldplay

I can understand why in their deepest minds people reach for religion at times of trial and misery. Because you don't want to feel alone in your head. You don't want to take responsibility for your self. You want something to do it all for you.
Life is a bitter pill to swallow because we have to take control. We are alone, whether we like it or not.
We are strong. We evolved to be strong. I have a lot to be thankful for. More than I ever will fully appreciate.
Ok, I thought it through and I'm going to resume the rest of the day. And BE BLOODY STRONG.
STRONG STRONG STRONG STRONGER

** The person I miss the most in the whole world is me. I miss the 'old' me so much.