FFS!

Good Friday. I'm sat here with the two Feckin' Ronnies on TV. Bloody 1970's crap. Why do they wheel out archaic material for a bank Holiday?
Someone's been on this site searching for David Sneddon's Tonsils The weird and wonderful World Wide Web.
I went to my Nan's house for dinner today. Mum and Dad were there and they'd got the traditional Fish and Chips for dinner.
I was perfectly fine. Felt quite good actually. Make up on, hair done. Sun was shining. But as I walked in the house I was suddenly consumed by this awful grief for my Nan. Last year she'd cooked fish and chips. I was really pissy because she'd broken with tradition. I hate bloody oven chips. Actually we don't eat many chips. None of us like them. Prefer pasta as a carb source than potatoes.
I remember being really sullen and ungrateful about the whole thing. This came back to me bitterly today. That, she wasn't there today. That I'd ever been mean and spoilt. And I started to cry. Everyone sat and looked at me. Like I was some alien. At first I don't think they knew why I was crying, then it dawned why and they just resumed eating and ignored me. I choked back my tears and carried on but I felt like crying for ever. I guess that's just normal.
Then we shopped, spent money on the kids. Luckily the shop Select had a sale on. Seem to have bought loads for Nic's birthday, but it was all sale's stuff. Clothes reduced to £3 from £20 then also buy one get one half price so I got tops for £1.50. How I love a bargain.
The kid's father just knocked on the door. He brought round a computer programme for Abby and spent ages telling me I needed a firelead to run it. Can someone email me and tell me what he's on about? He also told me I needed to type in a code blah blah blah. Run this save that. FFS I am computer literate. However I'm not so sure he is.
He gave the girls a fiver each for Easter. Abby was V ungracious and I had to nudge her to be nice. But part of me thinks of all the cash I spent on them today. They both needed new trainers and tops. I got a lot of it in the sale. Danz's trainers were only 8 quid but his fiver seemed so petty and small. I guess I should be grateful he gave anything. But his fatherhood attempt is so damn easy. Dish out a fiver and forget them over Easter. He didn't even ask to see Danz.
Oh and he was driving a brand spanking new car. Big family thing. Abby said nice car and he said not mine. Same old answer. He meant it was his GF's.... riight. That really means it is his car but he won't admit it for fear we think he's got more money.
Jerk.

• Hmmm I'm tired.
• I'm worried about Collette
• I want to talk to my mate who cut me short this morning. Just wanted to tell stuff but couldn't
• I just burnt a CD for the very first time way hey!!
• I want to drink red wine but not alone. All I'll do is cry.
• I'm jealous of RT who got mates staying O/N I want mates that stay O/N.
• I deleted my other blog today as after I wrote stuff I didn't want it sitting there. A bit like harping on about it.
• Next door continue to argue so badly that I may have to do something eventually.
• I wanted at least one Easter card.
• I did get a really pretty candle from RT though, thanx Hun
• Neither pc is working well. Lappy won't connect to the Nokia and this thing is just total crap. I need more memory ASAP
• I want sex
• I'd make do with a hug though

I did buy Embrace today. That Gravity song has raced through my head for 48 hours. I give in and bought the album. I downloaded Rufus Wainwright from ITunes. I highly recommend The Kaiser Chiefs CD. I want The new Beautiful South one but sodding ITunes don't do it... Need to go to Virgin I guess.

Got to go look for the Kitten, she's escaped. She likes the dark... Damn thing will get eaten by a fox if she stays out. Have a good evening and stay cool

xxx