nude flying

I kind of understand people's anxiety and worry about flying and the new security measures. However I do think Ryanair at least have tried to do something about the horrendous experience ordinary people flying have suffered lately.
But THIS made me laugh. Ryanair feel that naked flying will be the thing of the future. No clothes? No danger. No queues and no strip searches. Wahay

Ryanair has published this "humorous" photo, under the caption "New Airport Security Procedures Put Fun Back In Flying"

my club (and not the seeds and eggs one)

Ok one of those posts. I haven't done one in a while. I spoke to a good friend today who kept saying I was so much better and so much happier than he'd ever known me.
He's right.
Tonight, however, I find myself alone for the first time in ages. Abby has actually gone out to a party and Danz is staying with her Grandparents. So here I am all alone. I'm not sure what to do with myself. I'm a bit miserable.
It's been a a very difficult month. But it's all over so why do I still feel ill with it all and headachy all the time? Post stress fever? A bit like Saturday night fever but without John Travolta doing the splits.
I always feel so much better writing stuff here for you.
You know, I don't owe any money to anyone. I've paid my rent, council tax, all the other household bill crap stuff. My car has been taxed this month. And I still have some money to live on for the month. I have a lovely boyfriend who's kind, patient and understanding (and I think he loves me) Abby is sorted out for college and Danz seems happy.
Bailey is still a pain and is at this very moment ripping the material from the settee..... But oh well!
Hmmm life is good.... Remind me why was I feeling down?

Wednesday and all is well

There's just no bloody privacy here anymore. Here I am in my knickers cooking in the kitchen with the back door open. Now normally my high fences and summer garden would hide the patio area and doorway completely. I could have my very own nudist colony here with no problem. But this year has seen the rise of the trampoline. Those large 15 foot monstrosities that every single kid with a loving parent owns around here. In the mornings all you can here is the squeak of the springs as they bounce up and down in unison.
Today I'm cooking and some kid yells out "Hello Trin"... Then more quietly. "Mummy! Trin has her knickers on". Feck off kids, you're lucky I got them on.
The trampolines have caused several arguments. One child reckons she can do 500 bum drops and the other kid says she can do 5 million and there have been copious tears. The dog next door Tiababy is regularly man handled onto the trampoline and bounced until she barks like a seal being eaten by a polar bear. Kevin two doors down has been caught spitting on his neighbours one and his fav trick is peeing over the fence.
This is such a select neighbourhood. A virtual Pontins fest.
Abby's dad sent her a 20 quid cheque today. For her exams. Nice of him. But he spelt her name wrong. On the envelope, the card and cheque he spelt it Abigial. In the card her name is crossed out three times with various spellings and then he settled on Abigial.
On well. I guess I should have called her something easier like Jo.
She also had a really cool card from Clarrie which she was thrilled about.
We spent the afternoon at the college sorting out her course. They've accepted her thankfully. There was about 50 kids there who'd just decided to apply and needed interviews. It was chaos really. She has to start Monday at 09.30. She's appalled at the 'early' start. Ha! It'll do her the world of good.

googlisms

Always a favourite. Stick in a word or name and press googlism. I shoved in Springs all time fav band Showaddywaddy.

showaddywaddy is still playing live gigs after 30 years in the music business
showaddywaddy is perhaps not the best
showaddywaddy is also popular as sha na na
showaddywaddy is standing for
showaddywaddy is still rocking with hits such as "under the moon of love"
showaddywaddy is that it's a totally versatile band
showaddywaddy is every bit
showaddywaddy is well and truly here to stay
showaddywaddy is back with
showaddywaddy is most frequently compared
showaddywaddy is
showaddywaddy is not gonna be happy" said an anxious pear

I like the last line best.... Anxious Pear??? Hmmm

cheek of it

Wonder what the 'Others' are? Aliens from outer space? Politicians?

gimme meat

Gasp... they found out........

part deux return of the snake

Our Chalet or Challette as small Spring referred to it was situated right on top of the fun fair. It was jolly and charming to hear the screams and mechanical noises of the people and rides all day and most of the night. But a highlight of the holiday was when the roller coaster broke down. Those poor sods were stuck on there for at least an hour. About 50 foot up. I thought the fire brigade should have been called but no.... The ride guys climbed the ride and took the people off one by one, including a child and they actually walked down the chain walkway. Amazing. It put my girls off of rides for ever.

Sunday night was spent in the non smoking ballroom which was about an 8th full. The smoking ballroom was full to capacity of course. The entertainment was a very camp bald bluecoat with a lisp doing dances alone to a handful of small kids and a man in one of those awful character suits called maxi max (or something similar) then the cabaret was a guy from Bristol doing Tom Jones songs and Elvis turns.
You could also get a tattoo in the form of a wound (real street cred there) or a jewel attached to your front tooth for 12 quid.
Despite several drinks I felt the need to leave after an hour or so. I wanted a deep fried mars bar on the way home (yep they sold them!!) but the queue was too long with other hungry campers needing the sweet nutricious snack. Shame.

On the way out of the non smoking ballroom I snapped this classic picture of a cigarette machine.
10 embassy number six anyone?
Home now. We had a good time all told. The chalet was ok. Smelt of cigarettes. But on the whole was nice. There was a gutter outside the door and the entire thing was filled with ciggie butts. I have never seen so many. One wonders how Pontins will fayre when the smoking ban comes in next year?
There is nothing chavvier than seeing someone with a fag in their mouth. I know that my medical background makes me very anti smoking. Watching 50 year old men having half their faces and throats removed with cancer caused by heavy smoking makes me so angry.
I'd say 85% of the adults in Pontins smoked this weekend.
Something really has to be done.

pontins '06

Pontins Brean Somerset 2006. Bank Holiday weekend with a kick. We arrived before Spring and made our way to the restaurant where we had the compulsory chav flavoured all day breakfast and settled in for the duration. Abby was thrilled to see her old mate Postman Pat make his rounds whilst we were eating. She was obsessed with Pat when she was little. However seeing this 6 foot manbeast lurching around the place was enough to put you off your fried bread. Wonder if he knows size does now matter with Royal Mail?

Friday night and me and Spring left the kids alone (eeek) locked the door and skipped off to see the highlight of my entire life. Showaddywaddy. I was rather hysterical to find that I actually knew all the lyrics and the dance moves. I blame my parental Christian upbringing.
The venue was packed with Brummies shouting 'get your kegs off' and 'Give us a fag Les'. However Spring is going to do a rousing review of the show so I'll link to it when it's made available for public consumption(Go check) All I can say is "Pretty Little Angel Eyes"

Keep out? Who in their right mind would go in there. Abby had nightmares all night about The Ring and that girl with the rather unkempt hair chasing her. This was on the beach. We went there for about 20 seconds. Got sandwhipped and the kids wanted to go back. I have to say holidays are much more chilled with just me and Spring.

Danielle is bowing to Spring.... Us Trinity women know our places.
(right)

off on me hols

Today was ok. I was really happy for Abby. She did far better than we'd expected and one grade C more and she'd have been eligible to take A levels. She'd been so nervous. Spring said that the school's policy of not actually expecting them to achieve much was to blame.
Anyways she has more than enough for her chosen course.
Some of her 'friends' were celebrating tonight together. I hope she makes some really good friends at college. People who'll make her laugh and she can hang out with.
The official receiver interview was fine and I think that's it. Relief all round. New start. I paid all my bills first this month. I don't owe anything. Good feeling... Still tinged with guilt but it will pass.
Now on to our annual family holiday (lol) Bank Holiday weekend in Pontins. Chav central. But I've been looking forward to this. The time when the bankruptcy would be over, Abby's results in and sorted. We booked it because I just felt I hadn't done anything with the girls. I know Pontins isn't glam but it's fun... And we want fun.
And guess what? This weekend Showaddywaddy are playing.
"Lets go for a little walk... Under the moon of Love"
Now to me this is the better of the options. Previous weekends have had 'The Celine Dion Tribute Band'. 'The Cheeky Girls' or 'Michelle Gayle'
I expect Spring is at home packing his 70's rock and roll costume as we read this.
Purple velvet with huge bell bottoms. Class.

well done abby

you did me proud. Loves you
xxx

more pink stuff

The Hello Kitty Credit Card

As my mate Karl puts it so well.

"Because you know, debt and bankruptcy are so adorable!"

Got an interview with the official receiver tomorrow.... Worry worry worry.
Least I didn't have the embarrassment of cutting up this pink horror in front of him.

gay vee train

When you think of Train fanatics what comes to mind? Train sets? Anoraks? Steam puffer trains? Pink things?
Ummm rewind there.... Pink things?
Spring has recently taken a batch of new stickers for the Somerset and Dorset Railway. Car stickers at about 2 quid (I think) but when they arrived he was a little surprised at finding they were pink. His partner in crime Jules had ordered them and Spring thought he'd either had a MAD brain storm or genuinely LIKED pink.
Anyways seems the printer firm got the instructions wrong and the white background was changed to pink by accident. Apparently.
I think pink is probably the chosen colour of all train spotters.
Rather a shame that the next lot will be in dull bland white.




Robin says...
"Holy Steam Trains. Go buy a pink S&D sticker now Bat fiends. After all Pink is the colour of my Holy Genitalia"

matchmaking god

I get these damn Christian singles emails every single day. I reckon someone is having a laugh and signed me up or some do gooder Christian is trying to save my soul.
My mum's neighbour Edie is a devout Christian but her Husband Cecil thinks it's all a load of crap. She 'knows' they won't be together for all eternity because he is naturally doomed to hell and damnation. Oh well.

What bad luck that Edie wasn't able to take advantage of the fabulous Christian Singles service? She needn't have spent 50 years with the heathen Cecil (who incidently is a total gem, kind, calm, hard working, handy round the house and probably fab in bed)
She could have got "The One".
Isn't the internet great?

shut up head

Ridiculously stressed tonight. The bankruptcy has made me ill this week. Every day I woke with a headache and feeling sick and tummy ache. But this weekend with my birthday and Spring here I kind of swept it away. After he went tonight I got out the forms I had to fill out, pages of them AGAIN.
I had to do an expediture sheet which was so basic, I found it hard to get everything in and not look like I have thousands left over each year. Then write a letter to say why they shouldn't take the car and sell it. The fact it's worth about 500 quid and had a dodgy clutch doesn't matter. But without a car I shall not be travelling 2 hours to work and 2 hours back every day on a stupid bus. I shall go on the Social. Join the club here.
Then I had to get stuff witnessed... So I had to get Barbara next door to do it. Embarrassed or what? Then I can't find any wage slips except this months. I reckon the rest are in my drawer in work, but the forms had to be posted as they have to get there Tuesday Morning at the latest.
Then I have another interview with the official receiver on Thursday to find out his decision on whether I am to blame or need to pay money to him for the bankruptcy.
Someone send me some chill pills.
Oh yes, he wants bank statements. I am on a paperless option and can't use the internet banking no more as they foreclosed on me. So what am I meant to do?
Worry worry worry.
I am pathetic. I think Spring must be really pissed off with me this week.

bristol rubbish

We went to my Mother's for tea today.. A kind of birthday thing. Me the girls Spring and small Spring. My mother got the old photos out. Spring was hoping to find something incriminating as I'd found some really glorious pictures of him as a kid. One age about 2 with the jauntiest bobble hat just tipped to the right and one aged about 16 with a horrendous hand knitted brown and yellow tank top (don't worry one of these days I shall post them)
The subject got onto the bins. Bristol has been having wide spread trouble with our refuse collection. We have this new system... I don't get it. My sister said that's all anyone talks about in work... The bloody bins.
We've all got new brown bins for old food. Any old food. The bin gets emptied every two weeks along with our wheelie bin and recycle bin for cans etc. Now the guys on this estate aren't known for their degrees in ecology. Plus, the kids are bored. They've been tipping the food bins out, leaving them open so the flies and maggots are having the biggest block party ever.
I had no instructions with this bin. My mother says you're meant to line it with newspaper. I don't buy newspapers and if they think I'm going to start to line the fucking brown bin... They are joking.
The bin men are the surliest and most miserable bunch ever. Give you a mouthful of abuse soon as look at you. Last week they 'forgot' to empty our bins. 5 times I called the council. 5 times they told me a load of total crap about them coming to empty them... To no avail. The 5th time this girl called Sinitta said they'd come on the normal day Friday but take side rubbish as well. I was appeased. Friday came and I watched as the bin men came and picked up the side rubbish and threw it down the street in disgust. I went straight out and had a row. I won in the end. They took all the rubbish, but I was stressed and frustrated.
I have a ton of pizza boxes from my birthday outside. I'm going to collect the lot and dump them outside the council building later.
Fuckers.
We all know it ends up in China anyways. Recycle? Don't make me laugh. I may not stop.

my birthday

Once again I find myself a year older. This is becoming an alarming regularity that needs addressing. Anyways 36 is respectable.... so fecking respect me.
I had some lush gifts, most of which have to be returned today (apparently)
Thanks for every one of them.

I also have a new guard cat that Bailey is scared of. Wait till we get Heidi!!

snakeys

Spring is OBSESSED with Snakes on Planes. He demanded I ditch the BB final last night to go stand outside the cinema and stare at the poster.
Anyways, this scared him this morning as he wiped the sleepy fromhis piggy little eyes.He had visions of Snakes at Trin's. Go check out his excellent and magnificent film review. Cutting edge. He'll be writing for Rotten Tomatoes soon.

where's my mummy?

I had a text on Wednesday night to say the Kittens Mummy had gone into the farm yard for 10 minutes and come back with her leg all hanging off and bleeding. An emergency dash to the vets and she was back with staples and very dopey post operation.
She was a good mum though and woke up and straight away looked after the Kits.

However, Friday morning she decided she didn't like the staples and took them out.
My sister took her to the vets again and they kept her in ALL DAY.

So Me Spring and the girls went to the farm to help feed the Kittens. Spring has some pictures of Heidi with her bottle... Go check his site.
It was so cute. My sister had to buy bottles and cat milk. I made it up and we took it in turns feeding them. They didn't take long to catch on with it, though Ginge and Heidi were the best. The other three were a bit reluctant. But they all had feeds and Mini (mum) was returned home in the evening.
Best birthday present ever!

good rides

If there's one thing Littlehampton excells at it's funfair rides. The fair ground is one of the best I have ever been to. I felt sick just looking at some of those rides and the Haunted Hotel ride was skin blisteringly good. Paris Hilton eat your wax infested liver out.

But this particular ride was my favourite. Spring looking as scared as a person can be without puking clings to his parents. Worth every penny and hoping for a repeat later in the year.
True Class.

from littlehampton with love

Littlehampton was fun. Getting up early and travelling 300 miles wasn't too fun but there are always several strange sights once you hit Sussex like this Portable Petrol operated Toilet.

People get around Sussex in many strange ways. This isn't sure if it's a bus, train or boat having a bit of each incorporated in it's intricate design.
I nearly got run over by this train just diving out of the way in time. Spring wouldn't pay the 25p for me to have a go on it..... no we HAD to walk.

Spring's parental home was a cosy warm little place filled with comforting smells of disinfectant and pee.

Maybe Littlehampton was where Alfred Hitchcock got his ideas from?
I was attacked by several of these creatures after my large bag of candy floss.

drink the baby milk bitch

Oh how I love B3TA.

the world is a circle without a beginning.........

"I find it hard to tell you
'cause I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very very
Mad world
Mad world
Mad world
Mad world"

Tears For Fears (sept 1982)


I have had a complete nightmare of a day with this financial business. I guess at one point I thought, well ok, I shouldn't be bankrupt. You have to expect some flack. The main problem was the evil Welcome Finance with their demanding phone calls and persistence. Today's call and letter was about the car I had from them 6 years ago that was scrapped. I apparently didn't inform them of the cars condition and so they were going to prosecute me for some reason.
Being fragile anyways I completely lost it and ended up on the phone to Bristol Debt Advice again (the best people in the whole world) they said Welcome Finance were trying it on. They were nasty gits who were like a dog with a bone and awful to get rid of. Bankruptcy was the best and often the only option.
Then there was a letter from the council advising of bailiff intervention in 14 days because of a 83 quid debt I owed from a house three houses ago and about 5 years ago.
I wasn't aware I owed any money on this house, anyways tough luck now. I'm bankrupt, even if I wanted to make an offer to pay I wouldn't be allowed.
And there was other mess, but I guess the day has ended and I'm still sane (just) and everyday will get easier.
The kids father just rang me.
"Hello, I just called to tell you that I rang Abby last night and told her to pull herself together and get herself a job. How can she do stuff like go out drinking with her mates if she hasn't got her own money?"
What a sensible father he is. Job= drinking with mates.
Me and the girls have decided that (if) when he pays the child maintenance again we'll have it paid into their accounts from now on. I told him. He said "So you don't need MY money any more then?"
Sigh. Remind me again.... Why did I marry that cretin?

it's done

Well guys I am now officially bankrupt.It was quite a day, mainly because I was so stressed but I was brave. Never cried and got through it. Spring was so brilliant, telling jokes being sarcastic and just supportive. He even took me to the Wessex Flyer for dinner afterwards. Thanks love I won't forget that.
None of it was as bad as I'd imagined but it's not quite all over as now I have to comply with certain things and have this complex money thing sorted.
But I am debt free. I got home and there was a vile letter from the bank. "Rip it up" Spring said "Ignore it"
Then a phone call from those hideous masters of rip off, namely the 48% APR Welcome finance bastards who told me that the car I had 2 years ago that was scrapped was in fact on hire purchase and insinuated they were going to come get it. Well they'll have a job but I got quite worked up about it until Spring told me that all my assets were now in the control of the official receiver and Welcome Finance could go toss.
Still it unnerved an already jolted head. I feel ill now. I'm the worst I've been in ages. I think I need a quiet day to recover and chill.
I don't actually feel any different, no relief or freedom. Feel a bit of a failure to be perfectly honest. I'm glad it's over and I'm glad I did it though.
I'm sure I'll feel better in a few days.
However I'm not sure if I will ever regain use of my legs again. They are so painful after yesterdays trek to the outer hebrides. I was awake half the night with worry and painful legs and they STILL hurt today.
I have blisters and callouses and shooting pains. I need a professional masseur to administer relief.
Oh and ps...... It's my Birthday Friday. 36 yipeeeee! (no comments Jude)

time warp 14 years

Longleat 1992 Abby by the fountain in front of the House.

Longleat 2006 Abby by the fountain in front the house.
Where's the England flag?

long walk longleat

School Holidays and the need to take the kids somewhere... Away from the sofa and MTV. Spring lives right round the corner from Longleat and if we walk and ditch the car we don't pay the entrance fee... Just each ride.
So we walked. And boy did we walk. This drive way seemed to go on forever. The journey down was ok but on the way back and uphill part of the way nearly killed me off.
Maybe I should get some sensible shoes and not the slip on rubbish cheap things I wear.

Here are the intrepid walkers helping each other along. If you could have seen Spring's face... It was pure pain. Those girls won't leave the poor man alone.
The first attraction in there was a bat cave. Except it didn't say it was a bat cave but Old Joes Mine. First I thought it was a ride. We got in there, opened a blackout curtain, and a 100 bats flew at me. I was terrified and had to leave via the entrance. Spring thought them most wonderful.. He said they were cute. It took me and the girls an hour to calm down

Au naturelle... Spring finds a Railway. This thing took us all round Longleat with a puff and toot on it's bell. 5 of us got in one small carriage and somewhere had their knee in a most precarious place. Good job we didn't crash.

In the gift shop father and son find matching hats.
He also got wulf 4 packets of sherbert which he immediately dropped down his front and was attacked by a swarm of sherbert loving wasps. Cute.

fiesta food

Side by side like Hitler and Kate Moss were the voracious vegetarians wagon and the carnivorous cow eaters trailer.

Funny though how most vegetarian fiesta food seems to consist of Chips or wedges?
Still how about some nice Veggie chillie Nanchoes (sic) or a toastie vs a healthy helping of Black Pudding?
Black Pudding and a hog roast. Makes your mouth water?
I have to admit to us all veering towards veggie food stuffs, much to Abby's disgust..... But who was the only one to have a second helping of the French/Spanish quorn dish I made today? (don't ask, but it tasted ok)
I have to watch everything I use because darling Spring is violently allergic to Rape seed oil, which is present in Vegetable oil, mayonnaise, coleslaw etc.
Guys, do not buy this evil stuff. If you need oil buy Sunflower or better. Rape seed (AKA Canola oil) is nasty stuff. Cheap, full of chemicals and in it's generic form poisonous to humans. It's animal fodder at it's worst.
Want more proof?

"Rape oil is also the source of the infamous chemical-warfare agent , mustard gas, which was banned after blistering the lungs and skin of hundreds of thousands of solders and civilians during WW1."

If you get really bad hayfever in May/June/July it's possibly the rape seed flowering, in which case avoid it's oil. May be why you feel ill at times.
(End of Nurse Trins private medical broadcast)

2006 balloon fiesta

With trepidation I decided we'd risk the balloon fiesta last night. Memories of past event... Sitting in traffic for 2 hours trying to go the mere 6 miles back home made me wary. But I love the glow. It's so pretty and special and I always feel I should support the festival, with it being on my doorstep.
The traffic was bad getting in... But I know of this field just by the gates that''s a fiver to park all day. You can even leave and go back in. It's run by lovely people, always got spaces and away from the queues. Perfect.
The event was very busy. So many people packed in there. Not an inch to sit. We walked for ages finding a spot to park our bums.

We found this little place in the rough grass next to Gay Ballooners Monthly, who wrestled most of the evening... First all of them, then one on one. I did request a touch of naked wresting at one point but it fell on deaf ears.


There was even a London Bus there... Made me think of a certain Blogger mate of mine.


There were masses of Army and Navy exhibits for some odd reason. Maybe they want the entire population of Bristol to sign up? This is my darling Spring with his pint of shandy in front of a large gun. He's a lover not a fighter.

The Balloons were very pretty, very hot and bright. It was Spanish night as the event was sponsored by Harvey's Orange. So naturally we had music by Kylie and Ricky Martin as they are typically Spanish.


We left before the fireworks. A shame but my worry about the queues made it inevitable. We got directed out of the field and up and away from Bristol. I did consider turning around and going back into Bristol but thoughts of that awful year flooded back and we headed for the Motorway and did a huge circle round Bristol. It took 40 minutes to get home. On the way back the radio announced traffic chaos and people stuck in the official car park for hours.