So Christmas is coming and here comes the inevitable what the feck to buy everyone. Imagine my joy when this lovely catalogue appears in the midst of my TV Quick. Inbetween what happens in Eastenders, and the tips for holidays in Sheffield, pages.
So suddenly the worry and fuss about what to buy Spring and the girls is over.
The nail clippers? Not sure if this is best for Abby or Spring. A perfect little stocking filler.... Get it... stocking filler???
The Collapsible cup. How ingenious. Never be without a cup. In these days of plastic bottles and cans why would anyone want a collapsible cup?
.... Perfect for the long country walk when you may need a quick quench? Now you'd need a bottle of something to fill the damn thing which surely defeats the whole object.
Dishwasher friendly though.... Nice for dishwashers to have friends. It's hard being a friendless domestic appliance.
The adjustable safety chair. Perfect for sitting down ironing... I have just the friend for this one.....
The stepper.... Why go to the gym when you can have this cool contraption? Here you go Danz, this ones for you. Note the trainers Spring... You said you wanted a new pair. Apparently these NEVER wear out. You could wear them for eternity.
Roll out piano. The Boxing Day dream. Me, Spring and the three kids stood around the roll away belting out those old Bryan Adams classics. Marvelous.
Oohh how lovely.... Nice stocking filler there my darling Spring. No more wet spots. And they're perfectly normal looking too. There's a bonus. Do they do a waist 36????
Abby and Danz are BOTH getting one of these... Heck I'm getting one for small Spring too. How warm and snuggly. It sells it with words like Luxuriantly and encases. I might buy many.
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