silly old stress

Maybe not the worst day ever but pretty damn near. My body didn't want stress today. It was a tough week. Work was busy, everyone really down. They said my engagement was the only happy thing they've had in ages. More people resigned one girl who had 'terrible' Christmas Off Duty handed in her notice and left stat. One girl had a scan and was found to have a mass and whisked off to surgery immediately. A bad week.
So I arrived at 9 am to find a note on the desk. Dear Trin, unit horrendously busy... Doctor off sick, no staff and you're on your own. Fine, I've coped before. But we didn't have a Doctor. One poor over worked person for the whole unit. The first child arrived. Two hours later and she was still sat there waiting to be seen. The room is as small as my lounge. I kept apologising but I felt her parents pissed off eyes boaring in on me all morning. Another one who'd been sent home last night arrived. I watched the baby as his mum went to the loo. Sweet thing, needed a scan. I found him a bed. Next one arrived...Wanting to catch the next bus home. You'll be lucky I laughed.
The doctor was so painfully slow. He's lovely. Really kind and thorough but needs a rocket attached to him. Finally they all got seen. They all disappeared out of the door back to their own little lives.
2pm came. I was off duty. The consultant came in and asked me to contact 5 people to come in next week. I sighed and did it. The first one was really rude. Said her kid was fine now and she didn't want an appointment thank you. The next one was a raving mad woman. Wouldn't stop talking about planting bulbs, woodland creatures and her child's veruca. Luckily the next three were out. I left messages.
2.30 and I needed desperately to get home. Danz would be waiting on the door step. A doctor came in. The baby with the scan had a tumour.
I took a deep breath. The doctor went in to tell the parents. I thought about how their lives were about to be devastated. Wanted to cry, but it's not my child. Empathy ok but not overwhelm. We have to do the job. Keep sane somehow.
I went home. I got to the car park and my manager ran after me. She had an engagement card in her hand for me. Gave me a hug. I was choked up.
I got home, Danz was on the door step. I was in a foul mood. Spring text to say he wasn't coming till 6 now. I had two really nasty letters from people who are still bothering me post bankruptcy. Yelled a lot. Kicked Taylor out for trying to puke on the carpet.
Phew.... Feeling better now. Think its a bottle of red wine night.