Living as Trinity

2010-08-13T19:50:00.003+01:00

How much did I used to love this blog? Rely on it. Need it? It was self indulgent though but don't we all need some self indulgence at times?
My life is good. Very good. Salsa lessons, three types of humous in the fridge? (do you watch Mongrels?)
Looking in you might think we are very lucky and I guess we are in many ways but there is always the heartache there somewhere.
We started spanish lessons. I highly recommend El Richon in Bedminster. Chilled, fun, wine, tapas, good people what more do you want?
We're going to Cuba in May and hoping for an authentic experience (if possible) Ana is our teacher. Young cute and patient but gives MASSES of homework.
Work is like thick treacle. I'm keeping my head up but fearful that at any moment it might pull me under. Really don't earn enough for the crap and responsibility it incurs.
Want to retire but don't want to be old. lol! Love music. Love Salsa and the salsa friends. All from different walks of life. Older , young, strange, fun, lonely, forced to come, artistic, bold, shy as a mouse. Social life has never been so hectic.
So my advice? Marry again :P take up dance. Learn a new language. Travel and be bold. Fuck the strikes and volcanos, Twitter, only work if you have to. God does not exist. Take responsibility for your own life. Love hard, never argue. Spend time considering others and their feelings. Spell correctly and use grammar properly. Drink LOADS. Not rubbish eitther. Friday night? Just home from work. Yes open the bastard £30 bottle of wine. You deserve it babe.
Love love love and be validated.

vegetarian frustration

2010-03-21T12:14:00.002Z

Why oh why when you mention you're about to have a vegetarian meal do meat eaters feel it's the idea opportunity to tell you what meat they ate for dinner, what meat they are about to eat? How many dead animals they have stacked up in the freezer? Is it some sort of perverted guilt? I have no idea why you'd want to eat animals anyways. Do you realise they are transported all over the country and then have their throats slit. Taken from their mothers. Slaughtered?
I have no wish to push vegetarianism onto anyone. If you don't 'get' it you simply don't. But don't try to push your perverted (yes I feel it's perverted) eating habits on me. It makes me very sad.

Vegetarian Majorca!

2009-10-03T16:31:00.002+01:00

We have just returned from Majorca. It was meant to be 10 days of rest, sun and fun. It was ok. It rained 6 days out of the 10. Some of it really heavy. Thunder, lightening and flash floods. With shorts and sandal in the suitcase it wasn't that great.
The worst bit though was the food.
We stayed at
Hotel Playa Golf in Playa De Palma. Right on the beach and four stars. We decided to go half board. No nasty shocks with the food bills! Hmmm
We are both vegetarians. The first night we arrived at dinner and looked around. The food was plentiful. For meat and fish eaters there was every kind of meat and fish you could imagine. But for us? Well chips and side salad and.... umm well some squares of cheese and some courgettes in batter. OK. We ate.
Over the ten days the situation got worse. I informed the chef and head waiter we were vegetarian. You'd think I was an alien. They didn't seem to understand or comprehend that some people didn't eat meat OR fish.
The next night I asked if the tomato sauce with the pasta was meat free. No it had beef in it. However the next night the head waiter excitedly informed me the pasta sauce was vegetarian. Oh good, I went over to get some to find the pasta dish accompanying it was ravioli. With beef in the middle. Duh!
I began to dread going to dinner. One night the only options were Chips side salad and carrots. I thought that couldn't get much worse but the next night and every night after that they added meat TO the vegetables! Cut beans with slices of ham. Corn, peas and bits of what looked like chicken. They even took away our ability to have vegetables! They had salads, egg mayo salads with SHELL FISH!, potato salad with German sausage.
Pizza! out of 10 days it had ham on for 8 of them. 2 nights were just cheese,
I cannot believe the Spanish are so backwards in thinking that vegetarians either do not exist or aren't worth catering for. I have a Spanish sister in law whose a vegetarian.
Also the hotel were well aware we didn't eat meat. You'd think they would have done something?
I do not recommend this hotel one little bit!

Trains

2009-05-07T21:58:00.003+01:00

We just got back from a lovely day in London. We went to Bodyworlds and a mexican restaurant and Trafalgar square and China town. However the journey down was completely stressy due to a woman called Rosy Daniel. I do hope she occasionally goggles her name and sees this. She got on the train in Bath and sat opposite us on our prebooked table.
From the moment she got on the train she was on the phone. She was quite loud and persistant. Everyone was darling or sweetheart. She was a doctor and worked for a company that deals with a holistic approach to cancer. Some herbal indian remedy that seems to work in some cancers.
She was on the phone for 90 minutes. I know her girls names, what school they go to, what their headteacher is called. That one of them recently won an appeal to get into another school (which I know the name of) that someone has sold two shares in her company. That a man called Lambert had donated loads of money to her charity. Her email address, that she's organising some charity gigs for cancer with coldplay snowpatrol and her friend has excellent contacts with Portishead. The list is endless. I wanted to move but was far too polite.
On the way back we were in the quiet carriage. Now I applaud those carriages after Rosy Daniel.
I'm sure she is a very decent hard working lady but crikey, Information limitation woman!

Mad life

2009-05-07T18:13:00.003+01:00

Steve pointed out today that I haven’t blogged for several months. It’s not that stuff hasn’t happened worthy of blogging, oh yes stuff has happened in handfuls. But the need to tell the world via the net about it has faded. Shame really because as a diary resource this is good. Though sometimes on reflection painful. Was I REALLY like that? Did I REALLY do that... crikey!
Last year was a whirlpool of blood guts and champagne.
You know I never had any intention of remarrying. The marriage game was not for me. Done it before, it left a bad taste. I didn’t feel the piece of paper tying you up to someone was necessary. If you love and care about them you’ll stay with them.
But I hadn’t reckoned with Steve’s ex wife. Ex is a sociopath. She has no people skills at all. She is self centered and mad. Totally nuts actually. Believe me. I know all about nuts.
From the day we met I felt this underlying force that was controlling Steve and their son (W). Little things, little bits were said and done but I knew, however. that I was a major issue for her. It seemed that Ex was adamant that we were NOT to wed. There is the mind of a deranged woman. That she actually though that she could influence Steve in that way. But she did think it and her weapon was W. Her threat, if you do not do as I say you will never have anything to do with him again. But she couldn’t just initiate this without appearing totally nuts. It had to be done with subtlety... well as subtly as a megalomaniac can act. She had a receptive sponge in W. Stinging from the change in his lfe, having to share his father and not being the centre of attention he readily lapped up her vicious propaganda. He told us that they talked about me all the time, I was the constant topic. They talked about how to topple me, how they wanted Steve to leave me and life to return as it was. He also had a great resource pool in his great love of drama like Eastenders, Holby City and Casualty. Research has recently shown that children exposed to this so called drama find it hard to entangle it from reality. They become anxious and unsettled. Wulfric is allowed to watch these programmes in a loop. They are taped and he listens to them over and over.
One day on the telephone W told Steve that at the weekend I had hit him, he didn’t of course say at the time but went home told his mother who demanded he say something. However he couldn’t say when the assault had happened, why or had any reasoning. Over the next few months as the wedding approached I had Hit him ,stamped repeatedly on his feet, tried to hit him down the stairs, burnt him with an iron and then le piece de resistance Poisoned his food.
He told us he had even rang childline encouraged by this mother.
We also noticed that if something happened on Casualty it also ‘happened’ to him.
We had an issue with food one weekend because his mother forbid him from eating french bread because of the ‘well known’ link between french bread and constipation. As Steve put it of course the French population are well known for their constipated bowels!
I don’t really wish to discuss W’s personal stuff here but that woman is convinced he has something major wrong with him and has been known to give him 10 sachets of laxatives in one go. As a kids nurse it seems that people obsessed either with their own bowels or their children’s tend to be a little unhinged.
Wulfric also told us she had told him he had a hole in the heart. This is completely untrue. What is the woman on?
For his 13th birthday we bought him an iPod shuffle which he loved. She brought him a ball pool. For age 12 months to 3 years. We did him a party with school mates and peers. She had him a printer party (W had a bit of a thing with printer noises) She had a table. He sat at the top and on the other 5 seats sat a printer, his friends! Printers? He also had a tee shirt made with a printer on it.
Luckily we broke the printer fixation after W broke apart a brand new printer Steve had brought here that we’d had 24 hours.
We moved him away from printer noises to music... much better agreed? :)
So the wedding loomed. W became more distant and rude. The way he spoke to us was awful. The girls were horrified, that someone would come to our home and talk to their mum like that. He didn’t send his dad a fathers day card or even ring. When asked why he said he didn’t wish to.
The wedding day was lovely. My dear friend Marie was allocated to look after W. In a way where he was never left alone, needing anything, his needs were met and more. She is lovely and adores him and he likes her. We all got on the coach to Bath, Steve took a picture of the flowers. W began to get cross. He said his dad never ever takes pictures of him anymore. Steve laughed as he’s always taking pix of him. We have hundreds of them.
Interesting though that as the day went on W got upset. A lot of the pictures have him crying a little. He said he didn’t want his picture taken. Marie took him away to the hotel after a while and got him drink and sweets and they sat quietly talking about stuff. She said they had a lot of fun. Steve also spent time with him and in the evening party Steve sat with him most of the night.
Sadly after that things crumbled. We saw him twice after. He refused to come to France with us saying he had been before then a few days before we went changed his mind. But it was too late, the tickets had been set and he couldn’t come. According to his mother he was desperate to come but Steve spoke to him and really he did not want to come, he reiterated that he had been before.
We saw him in August 2008. We had organised it for the Friday evening but apparently his mother had an engagement on the Thursday night and he wanted to come then. I work a very long day Thursdays. I said it was ok but he had to behave himself. I couldn’t cope with him being vile. We arranged to pick him up from Radstock at 7pm. His mother had NEVER offered to help with the partial driving before so she MUST have been desperate to get rid of him that night.
However after that initial phone call he didn’t ring again and I was not surprised when he didn’t turn up on the Thursday. Steve was upset and finally getting through to the Nuthouse in Frome we found out they’d gone to the wrong car park, we had to drive all the way to Frome to get him. He got in the car. I asked why he hadn’t rang for 4 days as if he had rang we could have made sure he knew the right car park and avoided all the upset. He immediately screamed at me. How dare I ask him to behave on the phone. Who did I think I was, he was not to be asked to behave. We did have an argument for a few minutes as I was so cross. How can a child of 14 be allowed to get away with such crap, talking to me like dirt and being so obnoxious? But are not an arguing couple. Me and Steve have never had a cross word in 3 years, ever. The argument stopped and wasn’t referred to again. We had a good weekend. We took him to a spectacular play at a school near Swindon with drums, and banging and lights. He squealed with delight. He went on the swings and stroked the horses there. The sun shone and it was lovely.
We took him back and that was the last time we saw him.
He says he never wants to see us again, he hates his dad and if he ever saw me again he’d like to stab me.
He also wants nothing to do with his extended family.
We have been to a solicitor. She was so lovely. In telling this to people you always either get an incredulous look or people think it’s so complex and mad they don’t want to hear it.
She said she’s sure Ex is mad. She is pulling his strings and influencing him. It was deeply therapeutic to see her and worth the £300. So what now? The solicitor says he desperately needs to have contact with us to balance his crazy life in Frome. He however is ensconced in his life so much that he believes the crap she comes out with and indeed his own propaganda. The one thing I know for a fact though is that if he carries on with her in this way he has no hope for a normal future. She has a lot to answer for. Let’s hope she gets her comeuppance really soon. She is an evil woman..

human rights

2009-03-21T13:04:00.003Z

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7956450.stm
I have been in many a situation when a child's ventilatory support has been removed. It is never an easy decision. It is always made with the parents and relatives fully informed and part of the decision. Doctors DO NOT remove ventilators because of cost! I watched in horror as Ruth Winston-Jones lamented the doctors who had looked after her child Luke. Accusing them of wanting him to die because of Money. He was costing too much to stay alive. Personally I would sue this embittered woman. What a wicked thing to insinuate.
As paediatric nurses we are our children's advocates. We will go where the parents dare not. I have questioned doctors, disagreed with things and bloody well told them. Parents are too close. Of course they don't want the child, not matter now fragile their cling to life, to die. I cannot begin to imagine the horror of losing your precious child. But sometimes the child's life is so horrific. Attached to a ventilator. Having air forced through your lungs. Noises lights everywhere. Drips and drugs. Having tubes inserted down your throat to suck out secretions. Where is the quality of life? There is no comparison to a normal child's life.
No hope of survival, no cure, just a parents love willing him to carry on as long as possible to delay the terrible pain of loss as long as possible. How can that be fair?
I feel deeply sad for them. They will, like Mrs Winston-Jones, never get over this. The hospital staff will feel like they have failed. Not failed in their care of the baby, but failed the parents. They weren't able to reach a joint decision that was to the best interest of their baby.
I'm just glad I'm not the one who has to remove the tubes.
Dx

Unfair

2009-03-04T12:06:00.002Z

I've felt sad this week. Danielle told me a while back that a friend of hers was ill. It was suspected some form of cancer. CANCER, the big nasty word. Reassurance that lots of people were saved and he was a child, they'd try very hard to help him. His name was Jamie Fish. He was born on the same day as Danielle. He was diagnosed with a form of cancer Christmas Day and died yesterday 2nd March 2009. 15 years and 1 month.
It has hit Danz hard. She is distraught. They went to Venice and France together, they sat on the plane together. But it's the knowledge that people of her age do die. That terrible things happen not to strangers but people she knows.
He seemed like such a lovely boy. No one had a bad thing to say about him. Everyone loved him and he was always happy and positive. Danielle gave me a run down of each individual teacher who'd broken down and cried yesterday to my bemused face. I'd thought it odd how she seemed to take heart in seeing them upset but I now understand, in retrospect it was that they are human. They are just like her, they care. They genuinely liked Jamie and are truly upset that he has gone.
I have seen many children die. I have switched of life support and been the one to tell the family their beloved child has died. It never gets any easier. There is no magic way you can tell yourself to cope. But remember that as awful this tragedy is and as terrible you feel this isn't your child. This is their child and your grief cannot overtake theirs.
I cannot imagine how Jamie's mum is coping today. I looked at the girls last night and wondered if I'd noticed if they were that ill? We seem so busy everyday now. Gone are the days of playing and doing loads of stuff together. But to lose one of them would be unthinkable.
So my sadness seamlessly sweeps towards Steve. We haven't seen Wulfric properly for 6 months now. Wulfric isn't dead. He is very much alive and choosing along with his stupid mother to cut us off from his life.
Life isn't fair is it?
Jamie, I hope your next life is worthy of you mate. I hope you live a long and happy one with much love, kids, and fun. Everything you missed in this one.

St Moritz

2009-02-28T15:55:00.000Z

St Moritz. December 08. The snow we had here was NOTHING lol

quizzy

2008-09-11T23:22:00.002+01:00

1. My uncle once: I had no uncles I can think of
.
2. Never in my life: would I intentionally hurt anyone
.
3. When I was five: I bit the dentist and he threw me out of the chair
.
4. High School was: Hartcliffe Comp
.
5. I will never forget: my nan and grandad
.
6. I once met: Guillermo del Toro
.
7. There's this girl I know who: umm is this a Danielle story?
.
8. Once, at a bar: I set the bar alight with hot apple pie drinks
.
9. By noon, I'm usually: getting ready for bloody work!
.
10. Last night: I cried
.
11. If I only had: more kittens
.
12. Next time I go to church: I’ll burn it down
.
13. Terry Shiavo: who?
.
14. What worries me most: Steve getting ill
.
15. When I turn my head left, I see: the curtains
.
16. When I turn my head right, I see: Steve
.
17. You know I'm lying when: you could never tell if I’m lying
.
18. What I miss most about the eighties: being younger!
.
19. If I was a character in Shakespeare, I'd be: the one with the dagger
.
20. By this time next year: I hope it will all be calmer
.
21. A better name for me would be: Your highness
.
22. I have a hard time understanding: The scots dialect
.
23. If I ever go back to school, I'll: have school dinners yum
.
24. You know I like you if: I share my chocolate
.
25. If I ever won an award, the first person I'd thank would be: Heidi
.
26. Darwin, Mozart, Slim Pickens & Geraldine Ferraro: aren’t invited for dinner
.
27. Take my advice, never: refuse
.
28. My ideal breakfast is: nothing
.
29. A song I love, but do not have is: Halfway Hotel Voyager
.
30. If you visit my hometown, I suggest: you come armed
.
31. Tulips, character flaws, microchips & track stars: mean nothing to me
.
32. Why won't people: stop smoking?
.
33. If you spend the night at my house: bring wine
.
34. I'd stop my wedding for: no-one I love him
.
35. The world could do without: cigarettes Christians and Amy Whitehouse
.
36. I'd rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: Amy Whitehouse’s belly
.
37. My favorite blonde is: Owen Wilson
.
38. Paper clips are more useful than: religion
.
39. If I do anything well, it's: Ironing
.
40. And by the way: You aren't getting 7 monkeys for Christmas

Trin is Famous

2008-09-03T20:08:00.001+01:00

I really am famous. Keep checking it for the video I made. It was such fun despite the 'incident' ;)

sofa love

2008-08-30T10:52:00.003+01:00

Our sofa has died. To be honest it was second hand when we got it and it came from a house with dogs. Luckily all the cushions are removable and it's had many washes but Steve's cats are something else. They puke at the drop of a hat and for some reason the sofa took the main brute.
I took the worse one to the vets. I was kind of hoping they'd say she was past it but nope. She has a delicate tummy and now has to have 'special. highly expensive food.
Great!
Consequently the sofa has taken a huge toll on the fabric and huge holes at appeared.
I kept showing Steve various sofas I liked. Last week we were passing this furniture store by us SCS and wandered in. There sitting at the back was a perfect cream leather suite. A 4 seater and 2 seater. It called to me. Buy me... and do it now.
Steve sat on it and fell in love.
For the first time ever I was getting a new suite and it was gorgeous.
Delivery Friday madam? Not a problem. Paid cash off we went.
I'm not a very materialistic person but the thought of my new suite kept me going all week.
Friday we got up. Chucked out the old dirty vile monstrosity. Cleaned the lounge, even got those girls to wash the skirting boards... WTF!!
And we waited....
3pm. No sign. Hmm, I thought let's ring and see if they have any idea what time.
Then it all got messy. They'd made a mistake. "I'm so sorry Mrs Trinity but I'll have to disappoint you but the next delivery is Thursday"
I was NOT happy. He said he'd make some enquiries and ring me back ASAP.
One hour later no call, so I rang again. He'd done nothing. He'd been with a customer choosing HER new suite and hadn't time to deal with us who had already paid for their no show suite. Something wrong there?
So at 7 pm last night we had to go to the store and pick up the 2 seater ourselves, either that or sit on floor for a week. Luckily it fitted in the new Peugeot partner.
They rang today. They were sorry. They were nice. I'm ok, got something to sit on at least.
But they can't get the computer to accept that the suite is in the store and not awaiting delivery from manufacturers. So it looks like we'll have to collect the other sofa as well.
Brilliant. At least the suite is worth it!

Reporter Trin

2008-08-29T21:32:00.013+01:00

"Debs, I've been invited by ITV Meridian to the 'Dorset Steam Fair' as a blogger"
"Really! why you?"
"Mainly because of the S&D Blog"

So started our experience into the world of social media. I wasn't meant to go. I wasn't actually invited. Steve didn't want to go without me but it was ok. I would be ok on my own there. My mate Lyn had said there was a huge range of shops and I do love to shop. But one by one the chosen bloggers dropped out. Silly people, missing the experience. Steve mentioned me to the organisers. Told them I blogged and hey presto I was in. I wasn't exactly thrilled mind you. I was a bit bemused by it all. After all what did I know about steam and engines and machines?
Steam energy is one of the things that us at Transition Bristol think about for the future though. We've been transition members for a year or so. We ARE Transition Hartcliffe at present. Steam is a sustainable energy that will possibly play an important part in this fuel depleting world of ours.
So onto our day. We got up early and got there on time. We were met by Colin from 1000 heads
Colin was a good bloke with a nice hat. We had a walk around then met Sharon an editor for ITV and her quite adorable child Vincent who, trust me, really was quite a character.

They wanted us to peruse the fair with a camera. Chat to some locals, film a bit and just get a flavour of the place.
As you an imagine this was right up my street. I have been waiting to be 'discovered' since I was 18 months. Somehow though I fear it will have to wait till the next life ;)
We started off at the steam engine things. A long row of shiny smelly colourful engines all billowing out smoke. All surrounded by men in sooty clothing huddled in groups in deep conversation about bits of machinery. And they say women chat?
I filmed a couple of men who wouldn't give me their names at first. Shy!! right. But basically if you asked them about the machine their eyes glazed over in some obsessive cloud and they could chat for England.
I got the impression that Nostalgia was the name of the day but you see I was looking at it all in a different way. These machines moved without any oil. This was good.
Moving away from the smoke the whole enormity of the fair hits you. It's HUGE vast sprawling. You never seem to reach the end. It's noisy busy and happy. There's people everywhere. Old ones in those motor wheelchairs whizzing round, kids in prams, Teenagers on the fair ground. And a lot of men mostly in groups in deep conversation. Whatever you're in to there's something for you there.
Around every corner there was one of those noisy organ music machines. I can't bear them but there were people sat happily listening to Abba and Cliff Richard played organ style.
I've been to quite a few of these fair type places in my time. The Bristol Balloon festival is a huge affair here in Bristol every year but this Dorset place was something else. They had every type of food imaginable. Everyone seemed to be eating something really nice.
Everyone seemed to have a dog as well. I filmed a lot of dogs.

We walked miles...well it seemed. I had some lovely sweeties from a sweet stall to keep me going. We tried to find somewhere a bit quiet to film stuff but it was almost impossible. We found some owls next to one of the organs with a notice by them saying that they have their own mechanism for blocking out noise. I assure you it was needed!
They have camping at this fair. We almost laughed at someone wanting to camp out at a steam fair but there's no way in one day you'll even see a quarter of it. It's enormous.
We filmed and filmed. We filmed kids, dogs, people sat on hay bales, a man controlling a dalek, girls on the information desk, people sat outside drinking cider (think they made Colin jealous) Swiss dogs pulling little carts, men making hay with big machines, funny outfits, lovely army men (very helpful and informative and quite handsome!) people sawing logs with equipment only for display purposes(what's the point of that?)
Then we decided to stop for food and it all went wrong. I had the camera. I was holding it carefully. No chance I was going to drop it when I fell. I went down like one of those sawn off logs. I was more fussed about the camera to be honest. Got up quick and followed everyone into the food marquee. Steve asked if I was OK. YES I am a nurse. I exclaimed. My knee hurt and I took a glance. I knew it was superficial but there was a nasty gash there and it was bleeding. I thought I'd need plaster from the first aid a bit later.
Then it all got fuzzy because as we sat down I felt ill. Really sick and dizzy. I made Steve come outside with me and I had to sit on the floor. It seemed to pass and we went back into the marquee. Steve insisted I needed food and sugar but almost immediately I felt faint again and Yep I fainted. In front of Poor Colin, Sharon the ITV editor and little Vincent.
I must have been unwell because I am not the one to allow people to fuss over me and call an ambulance but St John Ambulance arrived to sort me out.
I think you tend to take them for granted at these events but they are pretty amazing. They were so calm and caring and I had a check up with a doctor and my knee seen to and felt really embarrassed and silly.

I did laugh though, there I was flat out on the ground all these people fussing and the non plussed unfazed 5 year old Vincent just sat through it all calmly playing his PSP game. Whatever he must have thought of it all!!
So we decided to go home. I felt I'd let everyone down a bit. I was very embarrassed but life is a big adventure and I did get first hand Dorset Fair experience of the emergency services. They told me that last year was a good year No one died.... hmmmm.
So what did we gain from it all?
It was fun, and I'd go again to see the fair. I was sad I'd missed my dose of retail therapy that Steve promised me. He was going to give me money to spend :(
I liked the interviewing and filming. I watching ITV West's little piece on the fair that evening. A young girl sat on one of those steam engines fawning about how steamy and noisy it all was and how she didn't have a clue about steam.
Missed the point completely.
I met some cool people. Colin the hat man, Sharon who really is a cool rock chick, knows more bands than me. I got to go on the ITV bus which was very interesting. And I'm still alive. Has to be a bonus surely?

sex ed youth style

2008-08-26T19:07:00.004+01:00

The girls got invited to some youth thing today. They've been doing a lot of consumer studies. I guess people trying to get into the mindset of ~~an executioner~~ today's teenagers (oops a little Mighty Boosh slip up there).
They came home clutching 'things' "It was all about sex" Mum , they protested. Danielle reckons she learnt more today than at school. "At school all we did was write as many words about sex we knew on the blackboard then chased a sperm on a PC game"
Hmmmm that's why half of Hartcliffe's teens are up the duff then?
Anyways, the leaflet gave them 101 ways to show someone you love them rather than having sex.
Here's a little sample for you lot out there to mull over

23. buy them a piece of the moon
26. suck their toes
33. write their name in the sand
39. write their name with a sparkler
67. go on rides on the pier together (cripes there's one pregnancy already ours burnt down)
88. Gaze into their eyes.

Apparently it was the youth of Brighton and Hove who came up with these ideas.
Lovely idea guys but..................
The girls got a lot out of it though. Steve just wouldn't make a very good grandad just yet ;)

car troubles

2008-08-26T16:00:00.002+01:00

The Suzuki which has served me so well has died. It's final journey was to the garage where they didn't even look at it. The gear box was fecked and at a price of a grand to fix the thing it was uneconomic.
Ah well, looks like we were down to the Pajero for now. I don't actually like the car. It's too heavy and bulky and monstrous. It also overheated on the M32 billowed steam and had to have a nice AA man come rescue me a mere 3 weeks ago.
Last week the Pajero also bit the dust. Driving along a road close to home doing 25 mph it suddenly started to rev like a maniac. I was suddenly doing 60 with no acceleration. I couldn't brake and was terrified. I managed to career into the side of the road and get it to slow a bit but it was still moving toward a load of parked cars. Steve rammed the automatic into park and I switched off the engine and we stopped.
So now it's been towed to the same garage as the Suzuki was. The mechanic must wonder what's hit him.
Thing is what if it had happened in a different place. I drive down Bridge Valley Road every day where that JCB digger went over the edge. That could have been me.
Imagine life without Trin? Unthinkable ;)

carry on frome

2008-08-26T15:48:00.003+01:00

My mate used to do a clinic where they assessed people with extra digits. Lop off the extra ones etc. She always said a fair proportion of them were Fromeys.

Not surprised really. Frome the land of those not posh enough for Bath and not chav enough for Warminster.

Thursday we had to collect said step child from his dear Mother. She had offered rather generously to drop him half way. I'm a known cynic but I fear her generosity didn't come from wanting to help us with our car situation (which I shall enlighten you with in a sec) but that she wanted us to have him Friday as she was busy and the fear was we wouldn't play ball.

We arrived dead on 7.45pm and sat watching the skateboarders and teenage kids messing around in the woods. By 8.15pm I was a little pissed off at the no show and Steve managed to get hold of someone who said they were in a different car park. Fecking typical! So we whizzed over there to find they had gone back to Frome.

So we set off in pursuit to Frome. Meanwhile the person we'd spoken to had got hold of them and they had tuned around and driven back to the original car park.

Scream very loudly! Completely useless.

We finally got them at 9pm at their house. They said Steve had told them the wrong car park. He didn't, I heard him.

Fromeys? Must be the water.

ship ahoy

2008-08-06T13:19:00.000+01:00

My new husband with his sister in law... ha. Note he is wearing my shirt.

I said puck you miss

2008-08-06T12:59:00.004+01:00

Six weeks post wedding and everything has calmed down. In fact sometimes life has been a little flat. I guess most of our energy and thoughts were taken up by the wedding since Christmas and before. I find myself fretting about stuff like work again now. I had work nightmares last night and they are mostly centred on me not being able to cope with it anymore and having to leave and the big moneyless abyss that would follow. Really though if it did get so bad I had to leave then it would be the best thing. I'm afraid not having nursing as a big part of me anymore though just lately it is unfulfilling and boring. I'm still having a few management issues mostly surrounding lack of support encouragement or recognition for the shit I put up with that NO ONE else in the department has to endure. My choice though, I took the job. Silly cow. Should have stuck with nursery nursing. Maybe I'll look back into doing something in that line again. Nearer to home and more fun...maybe?
We're off to France on Saturday. I liked it last year. The villa is gorgeous with every mod con in the kitchen, big bright and classy. The area is beautiful and different and it even smells lovely.
Steve's son doesn't want to come with us though. He says he can't spend a whole week with me. Sadly I feel the same way. Whenever will all this end and sort itself out? Seems to have gone on for ages now. I can't bear the way it makes Steve so sad. Every phone call and visit I get hugely anxious that he will upset Steve. My mum says we will have a better week without him. Steve says he'd rather not have a miserable child with us who doesn't want to be there.
Won't be the family holiday of last year though it will be different.
Maybe different will be good. If the weather is bad he says we will head south and chase the sun... lol. I could have told you this week would be bad. It's the balloon festival. It ALWAYS rains for that. Bloody English weather.
My sister is getting married in September. In Cyprus. I feel a bit pissed off that she couldn't do it here. I'd like to go to a wedding and not be the one doing all the organising. Just sit back and enjoy. We never wanted to go to Cyprus anyways. Not our scene. What with our wedding and our other holidays we couldn't afford it anyways. We did go to her hen night last week though, funny we were the only family to go and we aren't even going to the wedding. It was a boat trip on the river during the harbour festival. We all dressed as pirates, it was fun. Loud raucous and rude. The fireworks were good too. I love fireworks, though after my friend Chris's recent accident would be very wary about having any at home.
Right bored you enough my little blogger.
Loves you all as ever
Dx

Kiera Price

2008-07-18T19:28:00.000+01:00

my wedding 21/6/08

2008-06-30T11:13:00.000+01:00

paper stars

2007-10-14T22:35:00.000+01:00

Danz and Jeff at the station.....

post strike

2007-10-10T21:46:00.000+01:00

Ridiculous, old fashioned, idiotic.
BUT....

"Flexibility is the main issue at stake," he said.

Earlier, the CWU had said that some of its members would come to work at 6am, do a full day's work and at the end a manager could arbitrarily say whether they had worked hard enough for them to go home.

"I call that slavery," said Dave Ward, CWU General Secretary"

Bloody heck, sounds like my place.

(Steve better get his new hoody in time for Switzerland you damn postmen!!)

superstorm

2007-09-07T23:07:00.000+01:00

Hartcliffe Superstorm.

master carpenter

2007-09-07T22:57:00.000+01:00

One man and his shed and a little help from his friends

Bailey watches the progession.

Heidi ever helpful. She's got massive with the fluffiest tail ever.

DJ Yay

2007-09-07T22:51:00.000+01:00

Lyn's party 18/8/07. Danielle, Ali and a friend show us how it's done!!! Crikey!

update

2007-09-06T21:41:00.000+01:00

Sorry guys esp Jude. Seems life has overtaken blogging. My birthday was ok. We did a disco for a friend which was fun and met Lenny Savage who was cool and had a great voice. She did a set for Lyn my mate whose birthday it was AND she sang me Happy Birthday.
I still hate work but it's a bit less traumatic. I'm more empowered and it's a bit more interesting... and wow am I brilliant at taking blood from 3 day old babies now!
We booked THREE holidays before the wedding... Switzerland next month, Budapest in December (a floating hotel on the Danube) and Prague Valentines week. Decadent or what?
The wedding is all booked and sorted. The receptions in Bath now at Browns. Much classier and less hastle for me than that train station.
I'm still very much in love. He rocks my world. He's kind, clever, generous and lush. I am a very lucky girl.
See? good things come to those who deserve it.
Loves you all
xxx

A Tale Of Metatarsal Proportion

2007-09-06T20:42:00.000+01:00

ALIEN

vs

PREDATOR

Dear Mr Young

I am very sorry I wasn’t in to receive your telephone call today. I was at work at the hospital. Thank you for calling. Abigail informs me that Danielle is allowed to wear the ‘Trainers’ for one more day then we HAVE to purchase new shoes.

The whole situation amuses me greatly. I drove past Colston’s Collegiate School today on the way back from Frenchay Hospital and observed their shoes as they left school. Most of the girls are wearing the dolly type shoe chosen by so many girls nowadays.

It seems ironic to me that when I went to Hartcliffe School many years ago I used to try to creep in wearing 4 inch high cork wedges and Danielle is being reprimanded for wearing black flat enclosed shoes that my mother has a similar pair to.

I enclose some research from Clarks about shoes that may educate you about children’s feet. "Trainers are considered to be good footwear for kids because they are supportive, and well cushioned".(Society of Chiropodists and Podiatrists 2007 http://www.manchesteronline.co.uk/health/heat_medi/heat_medi_08.html)

Dolly shoes "Cause stress to the structures of the sole of the foot and back of the leg resulting in pain and inflammation."(Soc Chiropodists & Podiatrists 25th May 2005)
Considering most of the girls at school wear this type of footwear in preference to an enclosed trainer type I really think the school is not promoting health at all.

But who am I to say? School policy is school policy after all and all shall conform.

So Danielle, as you may note is wearing her old Dolly shoes today to school. Finances do not allow a single parent to buy another pair of shoes so soon after the first pair.

I wonder what will happen way in the future when research has shown that schools, by not allowing children to wear sensible trainers, have damaged children‘s feet irreversibly. I wonder whether schools will face litigation?

You may think I am OTT. No, I’m not. I just think that education doesn’t hinge on what my child has on her feet, rather the type of teaching, educator and individual approach that inspires and fills the mind of all things brilliant.

Incidentally. Mr Crocksford’s comment that my child’s shoes had a logo on? Well so do Clarks Shoes as illustrated by my enclosed picture.

Maybe they should be banned as well?

I am, however not saying at all that a shoe free for all should commence with huge garish trainers with sequins, glitter and flashing lights. Just a little bit of common sense and an individual approach.

Hope you have a wonderful start to term. I look forward to a very good year 9 for Danielle.

With best regards

(So? which shoes do you think are more sensible? Crazy crazy old world this is........)

Ashley Kate

2007-08-27T17:23:00.000+01:00

Newes Steve's cat loves it here!!
We've renamed her Ashley-Kate as she is a hybrid of Mary-Kate and Ashley. Stays in Danielle's bed all day and night, loves TV. Disco Music, dressing up and lipstick.
The two other cats aren't quite as easy. Elvie wants to be the boss. Hisses and cries at my cats and is mean as mean can be. She seems to love me though.
Pye is the worse. Cat sick all the time so bad that we took her to the vets. They said she had Colitis and gave her a steroid jab. Then she went all kitteny, running around and went missing outside (she'd onl moved her 2 weeks). Eight hours that cat was gone. We walked the streets of Hartcliffe calling her and getting worried. Then 10 o clock at night she turns up in the lounge happy as can be.
But she has to have food from the vets, pre digested or she pukes everywhere.... hmmm cats are great ;)

cornwall

2007-08-04T21:22:00.000+01:00

A week at a naturist resort in Cornwall and it was brilliant. Hot weather and no stress. Perfect. There was a funny happening though. The man in the next caravan to us only stayed one night. Seems he booked in with his family without knowing it was naturist and spent the night squirming behind the closed curtains till they could escape. Silly lot!!

stuff

2007-07-17T20:06:00.000+01:00

We are all very tired. Since we got back from France the kitten seems to have gone weird. She won't leave us alone. Follows us from room to room and wakes us 6 or 7 times a night to be petted... you think she missed us?
Back at work now... same old crap basically... I'm thinking of applying for another job... 'cept I don't want to let people down.... what ever to do!!?
Just been to see Harry Potter with those girls.... hmmmm it was ok... bit too lacking in humour for my taste.

Josselin

2007-07-15T13:59:00.000+01:00

Josselin, France

2007-07-15T13:56:00.000+01:00

Steve and Danz showing off.

Abby sunbathing

picture postcard village. Josselin

Well we're home and we had a brilliant time. The best holiday I've had I reckon. The villa was so gorgeous with huge rooms, dishwasher, the most wonderful cooker, white leather sofas and a lovely pool.The weather was ok. We had no rain and about 4 days of sun... one of which was actually hot. They all burnt except me.
Josselin was very pretty and my most fav place on the planet. I was at home there. I got to speak french and eat masses.
So now we're back... it's dark and rainy and England really doesn't seem terribly inviting. Sigh.

smoke no more

2007-07-02T20:45:00.000+01:00

Britain goes smoke free... and it hasn't come a day too soon. The thought of actually being able to go out without the hideous smell smoke is just pure joy. We've had fun driving past those little shelters with the losers outside puffing away on their cancer stix bemoaning about the hardship they are suffering.
Hope the poor little souls don't catch a cold in this wonderful summer we're having.... tee-hee
ps... tut tut Lady P... remember the days when even the puppets on TV used to smoke.

over and over and over... like a monkey with a miniature cymbal

2007-07-02T20:39:00.000+01:00

Thanks to Mrs Woman for her really nice comment the other day. However things don't seem to be getting better and I'm quite worried about my ability to burst into tears at various times during the working day.
I think it's because I've lost the control I had. Before if I wasn't happy, they'd say 'OK. We know you're good and wouldn't take advantage... so it's fine. Don't do what you can't do'. Now they just repeat over and over... 'but this is what you are meant to do'.
Every time I lose control I think I can't cope and I had a few times when I really thought I was going to just walk out and come home.
I just don't want to let my two bosses down who really are trying to support me.
Things are OK here though, Abby was camping the weekend in Southampton.. yep in the rain. Yeuk, can't think of anything worse.
We're off to France on Saturday for a week. Please let it stop raining for a little. The grey skies are not helping my mood at all.
Hope my baby kitten will be OK.... she'll miss me. When we get back we're moving Steve's cats up here permanently. Should be an experience. Anyone got any advice on rehousing 16 year old cats in a house already infested with moggies?
S'il vous plait.
x

still sad... tut

2007-06-18T18:45:00.001+01:00

I arrived at work today got out of the car and immediately had tears streaming down my face. As I walked towards the place I was getting so cross with myself for being so stupid. It's been 3 months and still I can get like this?
The day was ok though and I came to the conclussion that I really do like some people who work there. There are some I don't really know yet.
I reckon I'm still a bit bereft for my old place. It wasn't like work... more like home. Steve laughed at me tonight... yeah I know I'm silly. But I guess I never did change too well. That's why I stayed there 21 years.
It's really hard to go from somewhere where you're in charge. You call the shots, to somewhere where you have to report in the office at 08.30 and be told where to go, what time to go for dinner and what time you can go home.
Maybe it's time to go self employed. Any one want a mobile nurse?

creature features

2007-06-15T20:18:00.000+01:00

At present Steve has our lives dominated with horror movies. But not just any old horror movie. Oh no, the silliest and most ridiculous ones ever made. Recently I've sat through Raptor, which was about a man cloning T Rex's to end the world, the monster was a plastic dino with a plastic red mouth and a Grrrr that made Heidi's meow seem scary.
Then Carnonsaur which was a woman implanting T Rex embryos into women. When they gave birth the little monsters ripped through their tummies like some Alien Joke. Worse thing is the fully grown T Rex was the exact same plastic toy used in Raptor... but wait. Even worse the scenes were the same. They cut the raptor film and used loads of scenes but with a slightly different story line.
Then we had to suffer Minotour. Every 5 years teenage virgins were sacrificed to the legendary monster dear dear dear... what a bunch of tross.
We sat through 3/4 of Leprechaun until I could stand Steve saying "I'm gonna fucking kill them" in a slightly crazed Irish accent anymore.
Tonight we have "The Snake King". A 5 headed monstrous snake that silently slithers around surprising people. Then some film about crazed zombie nurses..... bet we have to watch THAT one... help

apologies to trin

2007-06-15T19:05:00.000+01:00

Well seems I was wrong in some aspects. I did write a letter of complaint...well of distress really about last Friday's party.
I really didn't expect a reply and in my last post I did consider that the place was chav because they were unable to deal with a complaint in a decent manner.
It seems that they received my letter and were very concerned about it. The shouty man wasn't in charge at all. He wasn't the committee head. He'd just said he was.
The actual person in charge rang Steve. He did apologise and was very amenable and concerned about our experience. He said no one had ever complained before. So I guess we did have just a bad night.
However, just to spoil the apology he did say that somehow?? No idea how. (Read Grumblemag's post about online exposure) They'd discovered the blog and were appalled at my small piece about the place. He said they'd contacted their solicitor as it was probably slander.
As you know Slander has to be something written that is untrue. This blog expresses my opinion on things. I live in a free country and can say what I like. I told the nasty man on Saturday morning that we shan't be recommending it to my friends. He said quote "He didn't care"
Oh dear, it seems he wasn't speaking for the management at all when he said he didn't care because they do care.
At least that at given me faith in them. I'd always liked the centre and found it friendly and welcoming before.
If only he hadn't said he was the big boss. Then none of this would have happened.
As for a solicitor? If they thought that would worry me, that was really unkind. After all the trauma I had last week. I'm sure the publicity that involves such a case of an employee being so nasty to us, especially with Wulf with us, would be very interesting.
I'm dropping it now. They won't ever see us there again. I am very pleased they rang and discussed it and said sorry. That's the right way and they obviously are run by people who are decent.

the party

2007-06-11T11:19:00.000+01:00

Never give Abby a Mic

Ooops upside your head.... lol

Least they enjoyed it

The cha cha slide in progress

the weekend

2007-06-11T11:16:00.000+01:00

Steve and Wulf at a BBQ we went to Saturday night at an old friend of mines home. Daryl is just lush. These are his carp... big buggers they were!

Deb and Dave. Deb is my oldest friend.... umm not in years lol. We known each other since babies

Abby strutting her stuff

Danz, Hollie and Grace.

stuff, nasty and mediocre

2007-06-11T11:01:00.000+01:00

These last few weeks have been weird. I've had several people tell me I'm not very nice... not to my face of course but it got back to me. The railway has been a huge headache. I seem to have put in a lot of work to no avail. The management are pleased, the workers hate it. They are rude and obtuse. They make comments about my size, my personality. I had an apron on with a cat on the front and they laughed about stroking my pussy.
Now I took this in good humour but after a long day serving the ingrates you begin to wonder if it's all worth it.
It ended up with Steve tendering his notice at the Railway and all hell let loose. They say it'll fold without him... well and me but I really don't think my input matters.
So it's on hold for a while and we shall see what happens. But for the time being the coach is closed and we need some well earned space from it.
Friday night we had a 17th party for Abby. I can't go into the trauma of it because I'm sick of it all but the venue was the Hartcliffe Community Centre. If you live in Bristol and are thinking of a venue keep well away from that chav nasty and vile dump.
We arrived and this vile man immediately set on me shouting that I hadn't told them it was a 17th. They didn't do 17th. They always ended in fights. Despite my reassurances that my family certainly didn't 'do fights' he continued with his nastiness and we packed up early and went home. The next day we went to collect our deposit with Wulf. This man was there again and once again he yelled and was completely vile. He shouted at us to "Go away" which upset Wulf.
I cannot understand why anyone would book a party there and feel if they have people like that working there they should be closed down. I write a letter of complaint but I expect it'll be trashed.
I think Abby enjoyed it though and Shannie said it was the best party ever.... love her.
Seems I managed to hide all the upset.
Work has been ok. Very dull and tedious but at least it's settled down and I don't cry every night.
We go to France in a few weeks. I forgot to renew the passport but was well relieved when it came this morning. It's got a chip in it...cook huh? Well £66 cool hmmmm.
Hope you're all OK.
Loves u
Tx

random

2007-06-04T16:23:00.000+01:00

That bloody train station in the rain. This place has given me so much grief lately. Seems you can't please everyone... in fact you can't actually please anyone truth be told. Today the chips are too thin. Last week the menu was dull, the week before 45p was too expensive for a hot cup of tea.
Maybe when the sun shines again we'll see some happiness there? I got Mivvi ice lollies after all.
This is the girls and Paul and John under the leaky gazebo.

Hollie Marie and her mum's home made cakes at the coach. Hollie is exactly the sort of person we need at the coach. She's strong sassy and gives as good as she gets. Hollie will go far (btw I asked her to be a bridesmaid. We got 5 now. Water, earth, spirit, fire and air. Very pagan)

Wulf, Shannie and Danz at Pontins. We took Wulf swimming the other day at the gym. It was kids time and they had old ladies doing bloody aerobics in the pool. He couldn't move anywhere.
I complained and he got a free guest pass for his best mate and he choose Shannie... awwww

Steve's picture. The girls and Wulf on the big ride at Pontins. Very clever and lucky shot Stephen.

This weekend in Clevedon. For some reason I've been in a such a down mood this weekend. So pissy and miserable. Why do I get like that? Hope Steve doesn't leave me ever. This was a good evening though with a long walk on the front and drink in a sea front pub. Danz poses everywhere!

Abby moaned about having to walk so far.. as usual.

Our Sunday times wine rack. How I love wine. Isn't it pretty?

Danz at the Harvester in Littlehampton. I wasn't impressed with it at all. Food was dull, service was good though but quite expensive and hot and packed. Littlehampton was a trial this time. It's so far from Bristol. Took nearly 4 hours to drive there and 3 1/2 back. Almost 8 hours in the car for a couple of hours seeing family... oh yes it was good to see them but I was so tired afterwards.

bridesmaids

2007-06-03T23:38:00.000+01:00

Practice posing.... oh help

car cat

2007-05-26T20:57:00.000+01:00

Heidi loves the car!

hair needs cutting

2007-05-26T20:40:00.000+01:00

This is at a pub in Horningsham... the Bath Arms. My hair badly needed cutting, had it done today along with all the other girls in this house. Steve's unwell. He stayed at home and played on his computer. My dad's got a Linksys router for his new laptop but can't connect the damn thing. I had to go down and assist but I couldn't work out why it wasn't doing it either. We ended up on a help line in India. They couldn't understand him and he got all cross. I think I know what the problem is now though. Going to see what I can do Monday. Things are ok here. Wulf's mother called a truce and things are happier. I dislike nastiness. Got to work at that damn coach tomorrow though. It's going to be wet so hope it's quiet.
Danz isn't well so she won't be able to help..... just me and a mountain of washing up no doubt.
We watched Idiocracy on DVD last night. A truly terrifying comedy about how in the future the dumb people survive the clever ones. If you watch it you'll see the point. If you're out there with an IQ of over 110.... have kids. Lots of them
lol
x

tues and all's coughy

2007-05-22T21:06:00.000+01:00

I'm sick of being ill. Seems I haven't felt well for weeks now. Think it may have originated from stress initially but this damn cough isn't in my head.... it's driving me nuts.
It was payday today. I however, didn't get paid as someone in payroll accidentally terminated my employ and she happened to be on days off. No one else can apparently work the computer. Bloody great hey? So no money.
Abby is searching for a part time job. She had an interview in Asda and passed but then they didn't have a job to go to. I think she wasn't all that happy anyways. Think we'll move on from Asda to smaller more personal places. She did get onto the next college course for next year, she's passed this course so well done Abby.
Steve's Landy failed the MOT majorly. Looks now like the MOT he brought the thing with was dodgy. Oh well, we were getting rid of it anyways.
I have a lovely new car stereo, with regards from Steve's ex auntie Edie's legacy. A Sony Xplod with Bluetooth to answer the phone through the speakers. I'm so excited. I never had a decent car cd thingy before.
Seems life is quiet now. No traumas to blog. Abby's having a 17th birthday party in 2 weeks. We've booked a room at the community centre... mainly so we can DJ. I miss djing. Gone so quiet ATM.
Hope you're all ok out there.
Loves u
x

bebo

2007-05-16T22:03:00.000+01:00

Don't forget to check out my Bebo... I love it
Trin's Bebo

bad bad NHS

2007-05-16T18:19:00.000+01:00

Sometimes it's embarrassing working for the NHS. My mum had major surgery last week. She was so unwell she had a private room post surgery. She spent a week in hospital. The care she got was appalling. She was in a private ward. She said if she'd have had to pay, she'd refuse.
One of the main things you learn about nursing and post op pain is you never let it get hold. Pain is easier to avoid than to get rid of when it gets bad. After surgery the nurses were giving her some lovely pain killers... yep just paracetamol. What a bunch of useless crap. It's a very mild painkiller used for a slight headache maybe.
Worst was they didn't even give her it on time. She had 2 paracetamols at 5 am and asked for more at 10 am. They didn't bother until gone midday.
Then there was the discharge procedure. There wasn't one. Thursday the consultant came, said she was too unwell to go home Friday. She'd had her catheter out and it didn't work so had to have it put back in. Friday morning a junior doctor came round and sent her home. They shoved a few spare catheter bags in a carrier bag and off she went. I got round there Friday night when I got back from holiday and she was in a right state. She hadn't been washed for a whole week, even with a catheter in that's meant to be kept very clean and no one cleaned it once. I helped her shower. I was shocked at how bad the catheter smelt. Come on, where is the nursing care gone?
Over the weekend she was in such terrible pain she had the emergency doctor out. He gave her some proper painkillers not the small box of paracetamol they's sent her home with.
On Monday my dad went to see the district nurse to ask for help. The DN was so cross. They'd not had notification she'd gone home. They'd have been into her every day over the weekend if they'd known. She rang the hospital to ask if she could take out the catheter herself. No they said. With that type of surgery it wouldn't heal for 2 weeks and they wanted to do to themselves. After all it had to be done properly. The area had enormous potential for infection. It had to be kept extremely clean and treated carefully.
So... why did the fuckers take it out Thursday? Why did they not keep it clean? And why did they send her home with no support and no clear instructions. They told her if there was any trouble to turn up at the BRI casualty dept and sit and wait.
If anything happens I have a good mind to sue. But the worse bit is those nurses who so say 'looked' after her. They are total crap.

growing up

2007-05-11T20:59:00.000+01:00

Wulf, Danz and the lovely Serena last weekend. Wulf has grown up so much this last few months. He looks older than 13 here.

swanage and what steamy fun!

2007-05-11T19:04:00.000+01:00

Steve on the steam train that took us to Swanage. It was so cold and rainy though. I was chilled through to the bone. Only had sandals on and no coat. Coat in May? Well I needed one. Why do I get so cold all the time?

The steam through the carriage window.
Swanage front. I'd have loved it if it wasn't so fecking wet.

See the mist and rain sweeping across the bay. Not a soul in sight. I hadn't realised how pagan Swanage is. There were loads of shops and this wonderful pagan vegetarian cafe we found by chance where I warmed up and started to feel a bit better.

bloody long bluebell walk

2007-05-11T19:01:00.000+01:00

Remind me whose idea was a long walk in the woods? Hmmm mine apparently. Like Hansel and Gretel on a very dull and boring Bank Holiday Sunday we drove out to Portbury and the bluebell woods. I think we went about two weeks too late as the Bluebells although pretty were just turning, probably due to lack of rain. The walk was so long though, I hadn't realised how far up hill it was and the next day my legs suffered. Steve said I was a wimp as apparently he suffered no ill effects from the mammoth session.... bastard.
There was a nice pub at the bottom of the hill that had rather nice ice cold cider on tap, so all was not lost I guess.

holidays....

2007-04-29T23:08:00.000+01:00

I'm all excited, next Tuesday we're going away for three nights to Dilly Dally again, our very special naturist place.... just me and Steve. Can't wait. Hope the sun shines, it can get a bit nippy ;)

kizzy is home!

2007-04-29T22:43:00.000+01:00

How bad am I? Life seems so busy ATM. Last week was so stressful and work is vile. I hate it with a passion. But very good news was Kizzy came back. I'd given her up for dead so when she waltzed in whilst I was ironing, I burst into tears. She was so hungry and looked thin. Now she refuses to leave the house. Wonder what happened?
We went to see Marie's lovely new house last night. Very nice. We had the grand tour and Danz stayed the night.... but it was to be a little traumatic. Sam my little DJ fell awkwardly on the trampoline and fractured his elbow. Danz said he was so brave, hardly cried but it was v nasty and he's in hospital tonight with pins and stuff. I felt so upset all day for Marie. Such a nasty shock. We took Hollie to the train station with us. I think she really liked it, behind that counter with all those rough men lol..... OK Marie I did look after her! This week we bought wood flowers on stands with numbers on. If they ordered food and sat outside they had to take a numbered flower.... they really fought over who was having the pink ones....
Wulf's mother has calmed down, she has a 'word' with Steve to say that she is SURE my motive is to control both Steve and Wulf. But apparently she's 'delighted' that we're taking him on holidays. Hmmm, me thinks control is her other middle name.
Work is still very wrong but I've stopped crying before I have to go in now... a step forward. I also sorted out a tiny baby last week that previously would have been dealt with by doctors. Now it's my job.... I'd been worrying I wasn't up to it, but I was fine, confident good, got blood first time, results back normal and a huge confidence boost. If only 99% of the time wasn't so bloody boring.
I am a bad blogger aren't I? Steve always finds time for his 17 sites... yes 17! But as my mate said the other week, he likes me having a busy full life now. Too full to blog all the time.
Get well soon Sam.... we all loves you xxx

pontins 2007

2007-04-24T07:55:00.000+01:00

Well Saturday and the one year milestone passed. So he got me these lovely flowers on an impulse from Burnham on Sea and we went out for lunch in the Somerset and Dorset Pub.
A pretty full year really. And the next one will be even more hectic and full.... life is good.

Wulf and the girls on a big fairground ride. He seems to have grown up so much this weekend.

The girls on the cat and mouse. Danz screamed the whole time. She's like me.. I hate the rides.

The water ride. They all got soaked. Shannie had white on and she was dripping wet. It was a really chilled weekend... really nice sunny and happy.
In complete contrast to the return home with Wulf's so called mother still seething that we dared to take him out of school for a day... of course he'll be on benefits for the rest of his life now! (Even though she knew we were away and the school were fine with it)
She was so nasty to him... yes HIM, when he got back. He called me sobbing to come collect him away from her and it was really hard for me not to drop everything and get him. But it would have made it worse at the time. The girls were distraught at the thought of him so upset.
Ha, I rang her this morning and left a message on her phone. I told her if anything like that happened again I'd be seeing a solicitor and I couldn't believe how mean she was... but there again she was the one who'd walked out on her 6 year old blind son so probably mean was her middle name. Touche.
She's met her match in me. She'd better watch it.

DJ SAM

2007-04-17T12:58:00.000+01:00

Future profession? Marie's youngest shows what he's made of. He told Paul that his last birthday party was OK.... but not as good as this.... lol

wulf's party

2007-04-17T12:52:00.000+01:00

Abby Danz, Hollie Marie and Shannie dancing on the patio.......

worry

2007-04-17T12:33:00.000+01:00

Kizzy's gone missing. I'm trying not to get overwhelmed with panic, she's a cat. But I loves my Kizzy. Little scardy thing. Trouble is there's blood on Abby's bed and blood on the chair down here. Something's happened. We've walked around looking for her. Called her all the time but no sign.
Abby's not coming to Pontins with us this weekend, so at least someone's here all the time.
Guess what Wulf's mother brought him for his THIRTEENTH birthday?
A ball pool. Sized for a 2 year old. The woman is weird. Lives on cloud cuckoo land. I'm waiting for the nuclear fall out from us taking him out of school Monday. She'll go mad. Silly cow.
See the news today? A student nurse wailing because she was left alone to care for a sick patient because her trained nurse colleague fainted.
I hope pathetic Nicola Chambers is never employed. When I trained we ran the wards. We never bleated or moaned. Frankly that's not the sort of person you want nursing you. Not the kind of colleague you want in your team... run to the newspapers when something goes awry. Plus she looked as chav as they come.
I'm worried about Kiz...........

low down

2007-04-16T08:46:00.000+01:00

How I hate outpatients. I've got today and tomorrow off then I'm in for three days and I'm already laying awake in the night fretting about it.
I went out Thursday night with the ex girls from work to a harbour side pub in Bristol. It was so nice to see them all again but opened up the wound of hurt that I missed them all so much. I could sit and cry really. Steve says I've been a bit snappy and sad lately. I hadn't realised how much had spilt over to home.
Maybe the best way to deal with it is with humour because really they are all quite pathetic. If thy think that in any way or form THAT is nursing? And to get into such a tizz over it... well it's really stupid. I did meet one really nice and friendly health care assistant last week that actually took the time to ask about me, wanted to get to know me and was laughing and happy. BUT the big problem is that it seems I took her job. She used to do the kids clinics on a Wednesday, now she has to move departments or move days. Made me feel a bit sad and a bit unwanted.
Seems the real Trin can't shine through yet...and will she ever?
Friday I spent doing Outpatients at Frenchay. I'd been warned by the other lot that it was pokey, old fashioned and the staff were a bit edgy. I was worried.... could it be any worse than my usual hospital?
Actually I liked it. I was left in charge, It was light and airy and the staff were all really kind and left me alone, but helpful when I needed some stuff to take blood. Think I'll like it there, wish I was there more really.
It was Wulf's birthday party yesterday at the coach in the train station. It was hard work but fun. His mother was there...... strange woman with her 20 year older than her husband (who was quite pleasant) It was odd serving food to them.
I think I need a holiday. Somewhere right away from all of this. Problem with holidays is you have to come back eventually. Do I sound a bit low?

Bloody People

2007-04-11T11:17:00.000+01:00

We've had rather a hectic weekend what with a trip to Littlehampton to wish future dad in law a Happy Birthday and two full on days at the catering coach making dinners and snacks for the bored Easter day trippers. Plus it was hot and I was tired. It was ok though, we pulled in about £350 for the two days and the customers seemed happy. The patio was lush with all the tables and parasols out. We sold loads of ice cream on Sunday and loads of Jacket pots on Monday... weird.
I was awoken quite early Tuesday morning by a knock at the door. I wandered down in Steve's dressing gown. It was this officious looking woman from the council.... ooops did I pay the rent? OK, she was on about the rubbish outside the house. All two carrier bags full of cardboard neatly squashed waiting the next collection.
I started a rant about how disgusting the 2 week collection was and how the bin was full and they didn't collect for another week. We'd already made a trip to the tip this week.... using petrol and damaging the environment in the process. The tip was full of cars and people tipping ordinary household rubbish. Ridiculous.
She started a condescending rant on how we didn't recycle properly and how we shouldn't put meat in the food bins as it encouraged flies. Suddenly Steve appeared behind me and sent her packing with his "This is a vegetarian family and I used to be a green councillor"
Cheeky bitch. This is Hartcliffe, if she knocks on the wrong house complaining there's rubbish in their front garden she'll probably be murdered.
Then we had to return once again to the bloody train station as the boiler packed up and we had a plumber coming... seems the whole thing was put in incorrectly in the first place and the whole thing needs replacing. Everything was OK until a worker arrived and was talking to Steve. Some thing got said about prices and he started this aggressive rant towards me about the disgraceful price of tea in the coach. How I was extorting money from the workers charging the prices I did. How it was obvious I didn't care and how he wasn't going to eat in there again.... so guys how much do you think a mug of hot quality tea is in the first class catering coach?
Any guesses.... from his reaction?
Nope you're wrong the price is 45p. Or 9 shillings as he put it.
45 pence? He needs locking up and I need my head read.
x

A few people had afternoon tea at the Mad Hatter's house. For some strange reason he was charging everybody; three pence for a cup of tea and five pence for a piece of cake. Everyone ate and drank the same.

new girl

2007-04-04T08:33:00.000+01:00

Monday 6.30 I was up and busy. The first day in the new job. Didn't want to do my usual thing of being late. I was nervous, kind of. I was sad that the ward was finally closed. After threatening to do it for more than 15 years.. they did it!
On the way I was swept with this nausea. Stupid really. I wasn't THAT worried.. was I?
I arrived at 7.50. Parked and hurried up the hill. I got there dead on 8. To my dismay the place was all locked up. A doctor arrived and struggled with the lock and opened it. He wished me luck on my first day. I got in 5 minutes late. The unit manager was there. I saw her look at the clock. I knew I was 5 Min's late but the bloody door was locked.
As the morning went on I realised that the reason she looked at the clock was not that I was late but 1/2 hour early. Hopeless! I was meant to start at 8.30 am. Got confused.

I started unpacking all the stuff we'd brought with us. Toys, equipment, machinery.
My friend Mabel, who'd got the job with me arrived. She was nervous. She was worse than me. Least I'd done outpatients before.
The morning dragged. It was quiet. We sorted out toys and books and saw a few patients but it was a long morning. There were no breaks... no paid ones at all. Very odd. I got sent to dinner at 12.30 with a gaggle of health care assistants who frankly didn't have a decent conversation in them. They had the TV on watch Englebert Humperdink for 10 minutes then the awful Loose Woman lunchtime show.
They chatted about inane stuff like washing and gardens and flying with liquids in your hand luggage.
The afternoon was worse.. far worse. Quiet and so long. I was tired. Up too Early, too stressed and post emotional.
5.15 and it was all done, cleared up and sorted. We wandered round for 15 minutes asking others if they wanted a hand. Nope, no one was busy.
So we went to ask the nurse in charge if we could go.
Now I finished at 6 but bear in mind I'd started work at 8, I reckoned I'd done my hours.
The nurse in charge (who I since find is the same grade as me) was at in an office on the PC playing solitaire.
We told her we'd finished. She asked if everything was done to wish the other nurse who normally works there said yes and got a mouthful because she'd meant the whole of outpatients not just our section.
I was appalled. It was being back at school and asking to use the toilet or something.
I told her I had come in 1/2 hour early so technically had done my hours. She said that was my fault. That I'd done 1/2 hour work in my own time so tough.
I was cross. How long was it since that bitch had done a first day anywhere. I was tired, information overload. I'd done a 9 and 1/2 hour shift and was only used to doing 6 maximum.
We did go home, but without any grace or smiles or pleasant goodbye, hope your first day was good. Nothing like my style of management or personality at all.
Mabel was so upset going back to the cars. She hated it. It was the worst thing she'd ever done. Sad really because it would have only taken a bit of niceness to have made it better.
I went shopping. Got stuff for fajitas because I needed a treat. Spent the evening just worrying about the next day.
Tuesday was better but only because we were sent to the old paeds wards to see if there was anything left we could swipe for the unit. There was a bring and buy sell on.... sort of. A free for all for the hospital. People coming and labelling up equipment and furniture to take away. Some sister from some outlying ward had nabbed nearly everything and was rude in the process. It was so sad. My ward that I'd been on for 20 years or more just ripped apart with vultures arguing over the pickings. My ex manager (Lucy) was there alone. She looked pale and tired. She had the clear the entire place on her own. I was appalled.
We got back and I mentioned to my new manager that I was upset Lucy was being forced to do everything on her own. She said we could go over for the whole afternoon and help her.
At lunchtime Staff Nurse Hitler came round to tell us to go to dinner (yep we are told when to go) I told her we were going to the ward after dinner to help Lucy. She was no pleased. "We'll see about that" She grunted.
Then I discovered that her and the manager actually dislike each other and there's friction all the time. Can I work like that?
We did go over. We worked really hard. Lucy was pleased to see us. I hope we helped her a bit. The day went fast and I got home 1/2 hour early without any trauma.
Now I got 7 days off and I need them. Steve is here all week too. We're going to Littlehampton Friday and the train station most of the weekend.
Not sure I'll like this job at all. I'll have to think of some strategy to deal with SN Hitler. I am not fresh and 21 and inexperienced. I'm used to being autonomous and in charge.
Watch this space.
xxx

Patio Party

2007-04-02T20:20:00.000+01:00

How many S&D workers can you get around the new tables... well 8 at a push if they aren't arguing about whose touching whose leg!
Another busy coach day. It was OK though, we got new parasols and waiting for the gazebo to arrive. Makes a change from laying track and moving train things around.

And we got new glasses for hot chocolate and Latte and Mocha Coffee. Steve must have had 4!

Heavy concentration on the arduous task ahead of drinking the hot chocolate.

weekend end

2007-04-01T17:02:00.000+01:00

Well I got the job. Weird really, I knew I'd get it. But I only wanted it because it was the best option out of those available. Really I didn't want to change at all. I've worked a long time in that place and worked hard into building up into something really special. But no point raking over old bitterness. Friday came, my last day and then it was over. No tears or emotion. Just a desire to get the fuck out of there and be done with it. I was tired, but I recognised it was an emotional tiredness.
It hasn't helped a lot that my colleague who got the job with me was having many second thoughts at the massive impact of a job without the support of all the others. TBH I will miss the rest. They've been my friends for decades but I'd been thinking for ages that I really should move on. Was never sure who'd take me with my tainted history... but this has happened... so be it.
But I'm dreading it. The stress of a first day somewhere.... yeuk.
I got to work a long day Monday and Tuesday then I'm off for a week. Can't bloody wait.
Anyways this is Danz, Tom and Shannie cleaning Steve's filthy car. They're all in the schools Bugsy Malone production. Singing car cleaners. BTW They charged us lol

kidz

2007-03-28T21:56:00.000+01:00

Abby's red hair

messy hair

Danielle growing up fast

Wulf being cool

his new tee-shirt

2007-03-27T20:05:00.000+01:00

He's very proud of it.....
Now he needs one to sort out vicars.

that catering coach

2007-03-26T20:13:00.000+01:00

It would appear that every Sunday for the foreseeable future I'm cook in the Midsomer Norton's Catering Coach. Quite funny really..... me a cook? This is Danz in the galley kitchen.

Spring arrives in the coach. I love Daffodils. They were my grandads favourite flowers.

And outside on the patio work begins on putting up the patio furniture. Really lovely tables... remember I'm having my wedding reception in this coach and on that patio.
We're having a grand patio opening on Easter Sunday from 1 pm (with disco naturally)

final party

2007-03-23T20:19:00.000Z

Wednesday and a different kind of final party. One for old members of staff, people who worked here years ago. Pat who was here before the war. People I havent seen for years... I remembered most of their names. Good job there wasn't any champagne this time. A lush fresh cream cake with strawberries. I didn't cry but Lyn did. I think I'll do enough crying next week.

Steve and Karen my ward receptionist whose leaving at the end of the week. So many people going or gone. In an intense period of time.
Ann's retiring. Vera's already gone. Ann, Barbs, Cath, Paula all got new jobs. I guess I have a new job too.
Hmmm.

today

2007-03-21T22:30:00.000Z

Today the packing cases arrived at work to move the ward. It was all so sad.

The equipment all laid out ready to go

Tonight was Abby's play at Acta. She played Lucy who owned the dating agency.

She drank a lot of gin and vodka and fell over drunk once.... good casting there! but she was the best one. Of course!

knut

2007-03-21T17:41:00.000Z

How could anyone want to kill him? I know he'll grow into a ten ton killer but hes so cute. Steve wants a polar bear cub for Christmas.... hope on Stephen.

SS GB

2007-03-21T17:34:00.000Z

I had my interview yesterday for the new job. It was meant to be 10 am but got moved back to 2.30. I was nervous, although I'd been told the job was mine all bar me being totally nuts on the day.
I was all het up all day. Couldn't chill. Stupid really. The interview was fine. She asked me how I was going to cope without all my colleagues around. I have thought of that but when she asked it hit home and after I felt really flat. How am I going to cope without them? Every time I think about it I well up and get all emotional.
So I got the job. It's for the best. I stay where I'm happiest at MY hospital. I keep my manager who is good and knows me well and change is minimalist. Why am I so miserable then?

Pat in the middle got the new job with me. She's my mate and I'll be glad I got her.

Steve bored or drunk? Nah, the DJ was pissing him off.

The girls in their finery. I had a little pole dance round them there poles!! My shoulder hurt the next day!

Saturday night was the big SS Great Britain event. Everyone dressed up. I had about 8 champagnes and 3 large red wines. All paid for. I was so drunk, started the drunk crying of loving everyone. The DJ was awful.... But it was good and I will remember it always.
The guy behind the champagne table will also always remember me... ooops.

sad

2007-03-11T21:07:00.000Z

I've been trying to ignore the passing days for weeks now but time is lurching forward to the day when the unit closes. The new ward is set to open April 1st. Last night I shut the kitchen door, put on Plan B (don't ask) and cried my eyes out. I'm so sad. I've been there so long. Seen so many things happen, so may children died, so may saved, happy times... staff babies born. Staff children died. Marriages, divorces, affairs, really fun moments and moments of total despair.
It's a really good place to work. There was this article on the BBC website recently about a woman with an illness who was kept going by her place of work supporting her and being patient and understanding. No place has been more understanding than my ward. I remember being so ill, my head was so distorted and begging my manager to let me come to work. She looked at me and smiled. "Debs", she said " We want nothing more than to have you back at work, but we want you better more. Get well. We will be waiting. We love and care about you more than anything"
I am worried about change, about something new... about what will happen but to be honest I'm more sad about what I've lost. About what every single child in Bristol has lost. A unit that cares, that goes that extra mile, that is excellent. Maybe It'll all be OK. Maybe the legacy will carry on. Hope so.
I applied for a new job in out patients. It looks good, busy, interesting, lots of extra investigations. Autonomy and diversity. Hope I get it. We did a pagan ceremony at the lunar eclipse.
Danz wanted to get on better with her school friends. Spring wanted less work, Wulf wanted less football on TV (lol) and I wanted the new job.
I think the next few weeks are going to find me rather emotional. We're going to the SS Great Britain on Saturday for a closing Grand Ball. Cost a fortune, but it's a full night of music, food and drink. Hope I don't cry all night...

this weekend

2007-03-01T14:19:00.000Z

Steve his sister and Wulf at the Bridge... he hates that bloody bridge.

Heidi loved Ella.

Danielle and Ella at Steve's Gran's 90th Birthday party. I had to laugh, a couple of them put together and brought her a bed jacket as a gift. She went berserk. "Do they think I'm old or something" was her argument!

MARCH!

2007-03-01T13:59:00.000Z

Abby, Alison, Ella and Danz in the City Centre

Winter is almost over. I'm so glad. It hasn't even been cold or wet that much but I need the sun. Heidi brought in a huge wasp last night. It was the biggest I've seen. Obviously survived the winter.
I'm on holiday this week. Much better than the last one where I was ill the entire time. Springs lovely sister and her daughter Ella came to stay for some of last week. She's loads of fun. Ella is going to be a bridesmaid with the girls and his other niece Victoria whose also very pretty. I booked the wedding for June 21st 2008 at Bath registry office and we're having pagan hand fasting ceremony at the train station in the afternoon.
Spring's been unwell with flu.... he's been so poorly.We did manage to go see the NME tour though last Tuesday. The Automatic, The View, The Horrors and the fabulous Mumm-Ra.
Check out tracks and tracks for the review sometime.
I'm OK. I like holidays but don't. The lack of my normal routine disrupts me... I'm weird. I'm also having nightmares most nights about the impending move from my hospital to another. I applied for a new job in Out Patients. Hope I get it.
I guess my blood results aren't normal either. I had a recall to the doctors to double check them but the most frustrating thing is that I have no idea why and want to know the figures.... Plus the next available appointment to see my GP to discuss it is in 4 weeks... the end of March... crazy.

O la la

2007-02-15T16:26:00.000Z

Josselin Castle

We're going to france. We booked it, all sorted. A Gite (sort of villa)

Well furnished modern detached 3 storey property with light spacious rooms and beautiful views. In a country hamlet, 500m from the Nantes Brest canal (lovely walks) and a short drive from Josselin. Well equipped fitted kitchen (m/wave, d/washer, w/machine). Large comfortable lounge/dining room with tv (English channels), video & dvd. 1st floor has bath/shower/wc,2nd wc & 2 bedrms - 1 dble, 1 twin. 2nd floor has 2 further bedrms (1 dble,sgle) and shower/wc. Travel cot, high chair, stairgate. Electric heating. Private parking . Split level rear garden with grass, terrace/patio, furniture & bbq. Private Pool: 7.2m x 3.6m and 1.5m deep, with safety cover. Open 1/6 - 30/9, for sole use of clients.

The famous 11thC château at Josselin is only a short drive away and this lovely old town also has a doll museum, castle ramparts & some good restaurants, crêperies and cafés. The Lac au Duc in Ploërmel (10k) has a man made beach with watersports and some traditional Breton festivals are held in the local area each summer. Canoeing/kayaking 1.5k, go-karting 4k.

Ferry from Portsmouth to Caen.We're all going... even Abby. I'm so excited. Have to brush up on the French....
"Je suis en rock star"

tale of a ring

2007-02-15T16:15:00.000Z

Spring wanted a ring... a commitment ring. We decided it should be white gold like mine. Plain.... or maybe Celtic... just not like the horrible men's signet rings everyone sells. So we headed to Glastonbury to buy one.
Glastonbury was wet. Full of strange old people in carpet coats and beards with nests in them. But no rings. We searched everywhere. Meanwhile I discovered I'd taken out too much money from the bank and had a direct debit going out the day after...so we set off to find a bank in Wells to pay some money in.
Wells had a few jewellers. We tried them all. We looked at every single tray of men's rings. And tbh most of them were hideous.
I only really had 50 quid to spend. Some of those monstrosities were 400 or more. We gave up. We walked dejectedly back to the car park. We walked past the very last shop. It was a girlie crystal shop with aromatherapy stuff and crystals. In the window was one revolving stand made of glass and as it spun I spotted a single plain ring. The tiny label said white gold 75 pounds.
Hmm, I thought. What's the chance it will be his size. I went in... the ring was a one off. One ring one size. The girl got it out. It looked tiny. But he tried it on and it fitted perfectly. Unbelievable. Then I went to pay and they said it was a one off 30% off day.It cost me 51 pounds.
Can you believe it? The right size, gold, price?
Believe in fate? Or maybe a little pagan magic?
I do.

Heidi

2007-02-12T15:55:00.000Z

I have never seen such an enormous tail on a kitten.

mark 2

2007-02-12T14:56:00.000Z

The single man waits for the world to end............. so we decide to investigate Edinburgh's paranormal.

Bored and cold we decided to DO something. A trip underneath Edinburgh to the vaults where once the poor lived in squalor and disease and darkness.

I was interested in the history of the place but the polish tour rep (of about 18) dressed in a Slytherin outfit was more interested in trying to scare us into believing the place was haunted. Most haunted filmed there last year and there was "lots of paranormal activity" yeah right.
This vault house a coven of witches who used the place for rituals. They used to use a vault further into the caves but the ghost who lives there trashed the place several times.

I pointed out that pagan's don't believe in death or ghosts. That threw her.

This is a pagan circle made by the head of the witches coven. He made it because inside the circle most evil area. Have they never watched charmed? The circle's INSIDE is the protected place not the outside.

The caves were damp and smelly but as for atmospheric? Lot of crap. The rep kept switching off her torch so we were in darkness to 'add' to the experience. Silly bitch.

And after that bunch of nonsense we ended the day with a Scottish high tea, cream cakes and sandwiches. On the way back the plane was delayed a bit...typical easy jet I guess. I was glad to be home though. If I go to Scotland again it won't be Edinburgh.

edinburgh

2007-02-06T20:00:00.000Z

The Royal Mile..... miles of Scotland shops

Even tartan boots.

So..... what a weekend. A very cold Edinburgh. My first visit to Scotland...
So how was it?
A very early and I considered unnecessary start... surely we could have got a later flight? 4am start. We arrived at the airport at 5.45 to complete chaos. Queues snaking out of the terminal. Then a very stressful trip through security when the tannoy announced the flight boarded and we were about 100 people behind the front. Eventually we pushed through, then Paula announces Did she need that little orange boarding card as she'd lost it? Luckily a guy in the queue found it and handed it in... we got on the plane and it closed the doors and we left.... phew very stressful.
We arrived at 8am. I thought we were getting a taxi to the hotel but no... they'd changed their minds and we got a bus. It was cheaper and got us to the town in 25 minutes BUT as soon as we hit the town we got off. 3 stops too soon.So then I had to lug my rather heavy suitcase (you need as much for one night as 7) for 40 minutes up and down hills and steps to the hotel.
We got lost and at one point did a complete circle on ourselves. I was exhausted. I was very cold. I had a tee shirt and leather coat on. I'd expected a warm airport a warm taxi and warm hotel. Instead I got ice cold wind and walking. I was not amused.
We put our cases in the hotel and went for Scottish breakfast. The meal had haggis so I decided to eat Vegetarian. I'd had veggie haggis before and it was OK. I was relieved I did. Every one's food was really cold. At least I won't get food poisoning I thought cheerfully (you getting the impression I wasn't enjoying this?)
We decided to catch the tour bus next. I was cold and tired. OK, least it won't mean walking...... As we left the cafe Morag made a turn off to the right. I said there was a bus stop just up the road. No, apparently you can't just CATCH a bus. You have to go to the beginning of the route and buy the tix from the ticket office. I told her that was crap and we could buy the tickets from the bus driver.
They didn't believe me. So we walked 20 minutes to the bridge and the tour bus office. We walked in and Morag asked for ten tickets for the bus tour. The woman behind the counter looked at us as if we were stupid. "You buy them on the bus" She said.
I told you so sat on my lips.
On the bus they all ran up the stairs. I refused. I was fucking freezing. It was open air. No way was I going upstairs. I could feel them bristle at me. I was being a pain.I knew it. I couldn't help it. I'm me.
So we toured through Edinburgh. The pre recorded tape was rubbish. I didn't know any of the people they were talking about... so and so born here. So and so wrote his first poem here.
We stopped at a shopping centre. They all headed for retail therapy. Debenhams. Someone help me I thought. Then they went upstairs and the Royal Yacht Britannia. Now, I am NOT interested in some boat where the Queen once slept. It was a tenner to get in. I was not paying that. I am now careful with money ;)
So I sat outside.
After an hour I began to fall asleep. Then I realised I was pissing miserable. I needed to go to the hotel, warm up, Have a wee and a sleep. So I text them and took the next bus back.
Back at the hotel I checked into a lush room. It was cosy and warm and had a view of the sea.....The Sea? I'd always thought Edinburgh was mid country. Oh well I never did geography at school.
I was so much happier when I woke up. I realised how moany I'd been. They didn't get back till about 6pm. They'd done M&S and Next.... etc etc
Why do women need to shop in M&S in every town?
I'd wanted us to all spend the evening together, but because they were all tired it didn't happen. We ate in three different venues. I got a bit drunk. And we ended up in bed at 9pm with Hugh Grant on the TV. Asleep by ten. But what a lovely sleep.
A sleep to take me on to a very long and tiring Sunday.... which I'll write about tomorrow.....
Night everyone xxx

pass the sword

2007-01-30T15:07:00.000Z

Back to the grindstone. I'm back to normal now though I have this awful cold sore stuffed on my face to add to my attraction (not).
Friday I got in work at 9am and was working till 2pm. I was on my own... no staff. Oh well, it happens but it was very busy. I had 18 patients through the unit. The problem was trying to get home. There was no one to take over so I had to try close. I finally managed it at ten to four and even then the wards moaned that I'd given them extra work. Bloody NHS.
Wulf has his eye operation tomorrow. He's taking it in his stride despite the fact his mother has told him a load of nonsense and horror tales about what might happen to him in hospital. That woman is so nasty and stupid. She'd fit right into celebrity BB.
I still can't use the pc. The dell is fecked. I called the technical line today and they're sending the restore discs so I can start again... maybe I'll be able to blog more then grrrrrrr......

lets go see Raoul

2007-01-23T22:29:00.000Z

I'm not sure how long these pictures will last. Picasa STILL doesn't work with the new blogger. It lulls you into a false security thinking it's all OK then the next day they're all disappeared.
If they do that I'll sort it tomorrow.

This is the big 13th Birthday party on Saturday. It went OK. The disco was superb as you'd expect ;) the hall was a bit too huge for the amount of people there... oh well. The girls were just like girls. A bit of arguing and weeping and bitching. Ah those were the good old days of being 13/14 and female.

This s Wulf and Hannah. Wulf really likes Hannah and she's a really nice girl. Abby requested 'Love Shack' for the 2 of them on the party night. Makes me laugh.

Wulf and the lovely Shannie. My third daughter. I'd love to keep her.

And the terrible trio. So the celebrations are all over and she's 13. Thankfully. I can't cope with that all again.

The dell is broked completely. Won't even load in safe mode. So this PC is taken over by aliens (well OK Abby) that's why I'm not here much (not sodding allowed) Sob.......

l i v e r

2007-01-17T23:04:00.000Z

I'm well pissed off. I've been looking forward to this week off for ages. A whole week away from vile work. No traffic or stress. So what happens? I get bloody ill. Viral crap thing that's had me in bed for a while. Now I'm left with this annoying cough and throat.
Tuesday was my appointment with the hepatologist about my strange liver. Apparently my liver isn't normal. It's bright and red and shiny?? and the blood tests aren't normal. Plus I'm a stone producer (no not the rolling ones). You don't need a gall bladder to produce gall stones and I produce them and the sludge randomly. So at any point I could get all ill again. Fecking great!
Poor Danz is poorly too. Her bikes pedal keeps falling off (makes one very poorly).... what's going on?
Her father was annoyed because on her birthday he expected to take her out for tea. When we had a family party here. My head is all mixed up. Silly dim man.
I went out for a drive today with Spring. Felt unwell but was determined not to stay indoors all sodding week. He took me to this pub where the average age of clientele was 86 and not a day younger. It was really funny, no music. No quiz machine just zimmer frames wheelchairs and easy access toilets. We won't be going back.
Best not drink anyways. My liver is more sensitive to alcohol. Probably why I get pissed with 1/2 glass of red wine.
Shame though.....

happy 13th

2007-01-14T20:53:00.000Z

Danielle was 13 today. We got her a lovely new mountain bike. Spring and me went halves with it. He's so lovely. We had such a trial getting it home from the shop yesterday. Seems the Land rover isn't that roomy in the back and we had to sling the front wheel over the front so I had to sit on the back bench seat like some ready for action lifeguard. I swear he went over as many bumps as possible. Nearly did meself an injury!

We had lunch in pizza hut. We ate like kings! Wulf eats more than his father! Least he likes my cooking too.

Danz and her nearly step dad.

And the new bike. Her father paid for lights and mud guards to be put on it for her. It's a nice bike. I offered one to Abby for her birthday........ imagine how that suggestion was met!

thanks for fridays

2007-01-12T17:22:00.000Z

Yay. I'm on holiday... well 6 days anyways. Work has been teeth grindingly horrible. We've lost a hefty proportion of the senior staff as they didn't want to go to the new place. The remaining staff are miserable and ground down to sand. Yesterday they weren't allowed a cup of tea as "this won't be allowed in the new place" Hey management. When you haven't got time to have a wee let alone a drink telling them they can't have tea isn't they way to boost morale and staff relations.
What kind of people get these managers posts?
It's Danielle's birthday Sunday. 13 years already. Where does time go?
I think I need some sun. I was desperate for the cooler weather last year with the heat. Now I want summer back. Our naturist resort has sold out and gone textile (clothes for you non nudist lot) so we shall be looking elsewhere.
Maybe we need to open one. Want a holiday? No clothes sun and disco's a plenty.

trio of trouble

2007-01-07T21:58:00.000Z

Abby Danielle and Wulf at the Warwick Arms.

The place where the cutlery is magnetic.

And the men Gorgeous. Loves you Stephen. I'll make you very happy you know :)

he loves pink

2007-01-07T21:20:00.000Z

Steve brought Heidi a scratching post. Pink, furry, fluffy hearts and girlie. But horror! Taylor has adopted it as his own. He lays with his paws around it, loving it. It must be heavily impregnated with catnip or something. Heidi is besides herself. She knows it's hers, so we get a lot of hissing and growling. Should have brought one for everyone I guess! Bloody cats.

The silly one up high.... Bailey is so fat.

trying to kill us!

2007-01-07T21:03:00.000Z

My lovely parents brought us a bottle of Baileys for our engagement night. My Steve particularly loves Baileys. So over the weekend we drank the lot... as you do. As we got to the bottom I noticed these bits floating around and a bit of an after taste.

Hmmm, odd. Steve also has a touch of tummy ache and so we checked out the bottle... now whose parents give them a bottle of baileys that's SIX YEARS OUT OF DATE?

Use by Jan '01. You think they're trying to get rid of us?

festive owls

2007-01-03T18:06:00.000Z

Over Christmas we get lots of visitors to the ward. The crew of the Pantomime, the rugby team (lush). The Kiss FM team. But my Favourite was the man with the owls. They were so beautiful, so knowing and graceful.

You can't touch them though as it removes the oil from their feathers.

happy new year my lovelies

2007-01-02T21:33:00.000Z

Hmmmm. Life takes over. Blog left to sleep.
So how was Christmas? It was brilliant. The best for ever. But I'm still glad it's bleeding over. No more worry about money gifts food and family.
Christmas day on the farm with my sister and her step kids over from Australia. Sad they have to go back. Then me and Spring came home and opened a bottle of champagne and there lieth Christmas Day because I woke up when Godzilla was dead.
The kids loved the gifts. I was relieved. Next year I won't fret so much. You're right you know. It's not the gifts but the thought and love involved.
Danz had Ice Skates for Christmas from my sister so down we all went to the ice rink.
Spring said I HAD to skate. One look at the mania on the frozen water and I said no way. He skates OK though. Turns out Abby can do it quite well. Danz was like a cripple. I was cold. They all want to go again. Hmmmm.
I worked every day between Christmas and New Year. It was vile. Busy, everyone off sick, no love or happiness just work, sick kids and hard work. I was glad to finish Friday for New year.
The New Years Eve Gig was BRILLIANT. We got to do what we love and get paid.... good money. It was at the Bath Arms in Wiltshire. The pub was beautiful, all chandeliers and paintings and soft furnishings. Midnight came and I was intending on counting down to 12.... but we couldn't find a clock that was accurate so with the talking clock on the mobile we hit it full force. An hour of 70's disco. Abba, Bobby Brown and Chic. Hilariously good.
Yesterday we had a family meal. All 5 of us with Christmassy dinner. I set the pudding alight with Brandy and almost the whole house.... I didn't realise heating it up would make the spirit flame..... and we had crackers with a party game. You had to describe some celebrity. Abby's was a black singer from the 60's. Yep you guessed it. John Lennon.
Help........

Spring ready for the triple with pike

seasons greetings everyone

2006-12-25T11:16:00.000Z

Heidi eats the tree. Stitches and all and she still climbs the tree.

But she does have moments of peace under the thing. Me and Abby had to completely redress the tree an hour before our engagement party as those cats had wrecked the thing and broken the lights. The party was good though, lots of happy people, delicious mulled wine and dancing.
And no one asked for 70's music.....

This morning at 7 am. Heidi just loved the paper. Merry Christmas to all my friends.

never forgotten

2006-12-25T11:11:00.000Z

Thinking of you at Christmas Nan. Loves you always xxx

poor heidi

2006-12-23T12:13:00.000Z

Heidi with the evil Collar on. She doesn't look happy!

Heidi modelling the latest way to wear the collar. Round the neck to the front. Tsk

Tonight is our official engagement party here. Party food and alcopops.... wish me luck xxx

eventful night

2006-12-22T16:01:00.000Z

Heidi had her surgery yesterday. I dropped her off at 8am and went on to work. 5 cats on and I still hate it and want to cry when I leave them. They rang me at 11 am and said she was fine and I could collect her at 1. Guiltily I had to say it would be 3. Work was busy. Pre-Christmas rush. Buy one get one free disease.
I collected her eagerly. She had one of those collars on. She'd been biting her stitches. She hates collars and was going crazy. On the way home I nearly ran over a cat who ran in front of the car. I did an emergency stop and the cat box flew off the front seat and. I did cry. Poor baby, just had surgery and I couldn't keep her safe and pain free.
I got home and my parents were here, picking up the girls for the Pantomime. They drove off and suddenly reappeared 5 minutes later with Danielle hysterically crying.
They'd got to the end of the road and been surrounded by a gang of kids with sticks whacking the car. My dad being hot tempered had chased them with the car and as they turned a corner a bigger gang was waiting with concrete blocks and stones and pelted the car. It was dented.
So we had a police visit (the most good looking cops you have ever seen).
Later Spring came over. All was OK. We were watching Heidi who took off her collar numerous times. I heard a loud bang outside. Some kids had kicked our bin over. There was rubbish everywhere. I picked it up and went back in. Then another crash and several small beer bottles thrown at the house. Glass everywhere and over his car.
So Spring sat outside looking menacing for ages in the freezing cold.
He said it hasn't put him off living here. Glad he was here though. Scary to be alone with that going on.
Little bastards.I don't think Santa will be visiting them anytime soon.
Oh one bit of good news... we got a New Years Eve gig at the Bath Arms in Longleat. Getting paid to party. Can't be bad.

Busy Old December

2006-12-19T21:21:00.000Z

Time to blog? Well my mate rang me today and said that there's time to do stuff or blog. I guess he's right. Last year I had time to sit and write but this year is way packed. Tonight I did some housework and was thinking about how much easier last year was. But would I like to return to it... No bloody way. I'm way happier and my life is full. So much has changed not just for me but the girls too. I hope they're ok with it. They seem to be. They always say that what makes me happy makes them happy. Maybe they know best. Years of seeing me at rock bottom and now there's someone else in our lives to share it all with and it's good.
Christmas is hard. I have zero money. No borrowing, no Christmas debt. Just have what I have and that's that.
I have a small carrier bag with wrapped presents for each of the girls. Last year they had loads. They have one 'big gift' and some small ones. Hope it's ok.

Saturday we went to Littlehampton to see Spring's parents. My first trip as a future relative in law.
We asked Springs niece to be a bridesmaid when the time comes. I love making people happy and she was thrilled.
I drove some of the way. Spring was horrified at my ton on the M27. Oh dear, when I get behind that wheel.....

Littlehampton front on December 16th 2006. All quiet and cold.

On the way back we stopped at the motorway services. This is the ladies loos. Christmas hits the services!

Today is my first real day off in ages. We walked to Symes Avenue. Half of it is demolished. The dust and rubble was awful. You simply can't shop there anymore. I've no idea how people without cars are coping. Well maybe it'll be nice when it's finished?

Note the half building with the wallpaper in the background. Kids paper. Someone used to live in these buildings. Poor souls.

The old chip shop on the corner.

getting taken advantage of

2006-12-13T12:01:00.000Z

Sometimes...Just sometimes.
I have a feeling that at some point in the not too distant future we shall be giving up Rainbow guides. This won't be without regret and a hefty dose of guilt. We started the pack up, have run it for a good 13 years and have enjoyed it. But it's getting tedious and tiring and samey. And where is the help and the enthusiasm from the parents? It simply doesn't exist anymore.
Me and Collette both work in the day now. I get home at 3.30 and have to be back out at 4.30 to drive across this sodding city to get there. She gets home similar time and has to sort out her kids... She has a small child to get organised too. Sometimes, when the city traffic has been bad I could cry at the thought of going through rush hour traffic again.
Then there's the hassle. Capitation (which is the insurance) is about 14 quid a child. We don't have the funds to pay that so we ask the parents... But they aren't interested. We have a couple of girls who haven't paid their subs for 5 weeks and more. We ask, they still don't pay. Then I got a narky email from one whose daughter didn't get an immediate brownie place as she hit 7. And I thought WTF? There's the woman who asked us to drive her child home every week even though it added 20 minutes to my journey home and was completely in the different direction for collette. But the audacity of it? You do it once as a huge favour then they take advantage.
Are we mugs or what?
I was also a bit narked at the catering coach last week. The guys who work there are ok, but they do take the piss at times.
Last Saturday there I am with party food coming out of my ears, crackers, decorations, sandwiches and a worker came into the coach and asked if I could cook him something hot. Now we never provide hot food Saturdays. We were only there for the kiddies Christmas party. I said no and he stormed out muttering about how disgusting it was.
Hang on a minute. Rainbows? Train station? We are volunteers. We don't get paid for doing this, we rarely get any form of praise or thanks. But we do it week after week.
And people wonder just why there aren't people out there who will do charity work?

deep joy for the festive season

2006-12-13T08:25:00.000Z

The lack of the Dell is really beginning to piss me off. This is the first time I've been able to use the PC in days and SHE has just got up come down and demanded the computer. She's going to college.... Why use it now? The repairers have had it 8 days now. There's nothing wrong with it but the actually lead is dodgy. It needs anew plug thing on the end that goes into the PC. But he's busy and can't do it yet. If it's not done by tomorrow I'm taking it elsewhere. Ridiculous.
I'm no where near ready for Christmas. I took Danz shopping last night. We came back empty handed. Useless. I have no idea what to get people. I haven't much money and token stuff is so hard to get. Oh well, guess it'll be ok.
The weekend was ok but hard work. Two full days of Santa and 80 kids. We had 2 complaints that they didn't like the gifts. One child got the wrong present. He was 11 and got a colouring book... It wasn't meant to be that. And one woman said her kids hated train stuff and wants a refund. Guess you can't please them all but if you don't like trains don't come see Santa in a train station!

The girls worked really hard. They both dressed up. Abby in a red Santa dress creation and Danz as a Christmas tree.

And my Spring in his Reindeer suit. His antlers broke the trimmings in the catering coach and I was not amused. He was charging a pound for a photo. I told him to get lost. I was his betrothed... Blood cheek.

Yesterday he took me to his Christmas lunch with the rail gang. Hmmm. It included a ride on a 'train' and an hour slide show on steam engines with the guy who collects waistcoats....

This is the 'train' they all loved it. I was freezing. I find it hard to enjoy anything when I'm slowly dying of frost bite. Dinner was nice and we skipped the slide show for fear I'd pass away of boredom. On the way out we came across a hunt. Spring yelled abuse at them as we passed. Interesting day!

yawn

2006-12-08T15:34:00.000Z

Waiting for Christmas is sooo tiring.

quickie

2006-12-06T16:11:00.000Z

Bad blogger I am. I haven't been online much at all. The Dell laptop has broke completely after 9 months. It's guarantee was just three months as well. Crap. So it's at some PC repairers I found in the yellow pages and Abby has commandeered this thing. She's on her way back from college as I write!
I'm ok. I got a bit stressy yesterday. Me and Spring went to the train station to pick out gifts for the 80 kids coming to the Santa special on the weekend. On the way back we stopped at a pub at about 1pm for a quick sandwich. I had psychiatry at 2pm. Pushing it? Well I asked how long a sandwich would take. 20 minutes they said. 45 mins later we were asking where they were and asking for a take away bag. Hopeless. We got home, I grabbed the car and raced to the clinic panicking and stressed. I got there to find there were no doctors. My appointment was cancelled and they hadn't told me. I was fuming. NHS? Crap.
I'll post some pictures and stuff tomorrow. Got a day off except it isn't really as I have to go decorate the train carriage for bloody Santa. Oh well it might be fun.

silly old stress

2006-12-01T16:15:00.000Z

Maybe not the worst day ever but pretty damn near. My body didn't want stress today. It was a tough week. Work was busy, everyone really down. They said my engagement was the only happy thing they've had in ages. More people resigned one girl who had 'terrible' Christmas Off Duty handed in her notice and left stat. One girl had a scan and was found to have a mass and whisked off to surgery immediately. A bad week.
So I arrived at 9 am to find a note on the desk. Dear Trin, unit horrendously busy... Doctor off sick, no staff and you're on your own. Fine, I've coped before. But we didn't have a Doctor. One poor over worked person for the whole unit. The first child arrived. Two hours later and she was still sat there waiting to be seen. The room is as small as my lounge. I kept apologising but I felt her parents pissed off eyes boaring in on me all morning. Another one who'd been sent home last night arrived. I watched the baby as his mum went to the loo. Sweet thing, needed a scan. I found him a bed. Next one arrived...Wanting to catch the next bus home. You'll be lucky I laughed.
The doctor was so painfully slow. He's lovely. Really kind and thorough but needs a rocket attached to him. Finally they all got seen. They all disappeared out of the door back to their own little lives.
2pm came. I was off duty. The consultant came in and asked me to contact 5 people to come in next week. I sighed and did it. The first one was really rude. Said her kid was fine now and she didn't want an appointment thank you. The next one was a raving mad woman. Wouldn't stop talking about planting bulbs, woodland creatures and her child's veruca. Luckily the next three were out. I left messages.
2.30 and I needed desperately to get home. Danz would be waiting on the door step. A doctor came in. The baby with the scan had a tumour.
I took a deep breath. The doctor went in to tell the parents. I thought about how their lives were about to be devastated. Wanted to cry, but it's not my child. Empathy ok but not overwhelm. We have to do the job. Keep sane somehow.
I went home. I got to the car park and my manager ran after me. She had an engagement card in her hand for me. Gave me a hug. I was choked up.
I got home, Danz was on the door step. I was in a foul mood. Spring text to say he wasn't coming till 6 now. I had two really nasty letters from people who are still bothering me post bankruptcy. Yelled a lot. Kicked Taylor out for trying to puke on the carpet.
Phew.... Feeling better now. Think its a bottle of red wine night.

handfasting

2006-11-28T22:08:00.000Z

Trinity would like to warmly announce that she's getting engaged....

Heck! Yes this week Spring asked me to marry him. Now as Spring's boy Wulf quite rightly pointed out "You don't believe in marriage" My views have always been that you don't need that bit of paper to be with someone, love someone and make a successful life together. But our lives are complex and it will take something momentous to make us sit up and take the plunge to start the rest of our lives as a couple.

Truth is I love him. He's very special to me. He's clever and kind. He has the best sense of humour. He's creative and caring. This recent illness spell has made me realise just how much he means to me. I miss him when he's not here. It's like something is missing from my life.

So, what did the girls say? Abby was incredulous and told him he isn't moving in here. Wulf said I wasn't marrying his father under any circumstances. Danz wants to change her surname to his and can't wait. She's so excited she could burst. She wants a dad.

Guess what? HER father rang this morning at 7.30am. He doesn't know what to get them for Christmas (hardly surprising as he doesn't know them any more) So he's putting a cheque in a card for them. He'll chuck it through the letter box on Christmas Eve on his way to his 2 week holiday with his GF and her kids. Nice one.

It's been a hard 6 years. I've had so many periods of being so low. Feeling unloveable. Being so alone. Trying to find something but not sure what I wanted. I made so many friends on the way. People that I wouldn't be here now if they hadn't helped me along. And now I just feel really happy and content like this is right.

We got a ring today. I can't have it till Christmas. It's white gold and pretty. Special... Like my Spring.

xXx

oh my love.....

2006-11-26T22:26:00.000Z

Today had a cursory visit to the parents. They know Spring is a vegetarian. So my mum makes sausage rolls for dinner. Well sausages are hardly meat are they?
We went to the gym for the first time in ages. Spring really isn't up to it... But you have to start somewhere. In the changing rooms I noticed this distressed looking young woman with a towel round her. She was frantically calling people on her mobile. I heard her say... "Are you home. Look I'm at the gym. I need a huge favour. It's an emergency. I've had my shower and found I've forgotten my hair mousse".
Emergency? Hmmm.
Anyways thanks for the pep talk Chris. You made me think. We're going to put a bed in Danz room for Spring's son, a place of his own here. With some of his things here so he doesn't get so bored. I guess this girlie house isn't set up for boys.
We took Heidi out for a garden walk today... umm rather garden sit down and refuse to move again. She hates her paws getting wet.
Call herself a kitten.. Aren't they meant to bound around carelessly?

tale of a tail

2006-11-22T18:52:00.000Z

Heidi chews her tail to get to sleep... It's horrendous. All wet and sticky. Here it is in all it's glory!

You talking about me? I'm cute. Leave me alone. I haven't done nothing wrong.

Heidi went out on her lead for the very first time today... It was hopeless. She refused to move and tried to get back in the house all the time. Here she is looking distinctively miserable.

today

2006-11-22T18:42:00.000Z

Me and Spring went out today to the fancy dress shop to get his Reindeer outfit for Santa weekend at the railway. We drove down some back streets in Bedminster and past Doll's house. Doll was my Nan's best friend. Whenever I pass her house I always remember that day when Nan died. I offered to go round and tell Doll the bad news. They'd been inseparable for many years. They'd grown up together, been through the war together and stayed friends throughout everything. Doll took it worse than my mum. She was inconsolable.
As we past her house I told Spring about that awful day. I noticed a Police car parked outside the house.
We went into the fancy dress shop and got him his costume and Danz a Christmas Tree Costume. I also managed to get my glasses frame completely replaced in Specsavers. A relief. Can't see a thing without them.
We got home and my Mum called. Doll had died. After Nan died Doll went to pieces and my mum took over. Doing her washing, taking her shopping and taking her every Wednesday morning to the hairdresser. This morning she'd gone in the get her and found her dead on the kitchen floor. Head gashed... Presumably from a fall. She'd called 999, paramedics, police and eventually the coroner arrived.
She'd had to call Doll's grandson and make police statements. She was so upset.
Spring is still not right at all. He's getting there slowly but gets these episodes of weakness and dizziness and numb hands. He was meant to be taking his boy to an appointment a big distance away next week. But he's not well enough to do such a arduous and hectic day. So much to her annoyance and disdain his ex has to take her son. I have to admit to being really cross with her attitude to Spring. Compassion? She doesn't even know the meaning.
Work remains a place of sadness too. Tuesday was very bleak. Two of the staff nurses had lost a parent in the night... One lost her Mum and one her dad. Really sad.
I had a shock to find out I didn't get some off duty request I made. I don't ask a lot. Christmas week the unit is only open three days and I work 4 days. My manager pointed it out. "OK I'll take a days holiday" I said sensibly. Apparently I can't. No-one is allowed holiday that week... So let me get this straight. I work 4 days a week and we are only open three days?
Are they stupid or what? I don't need that stress.
Anyways. The highlight of the day was Spring in his reindeer outfit. Very.... ummm..... Festive.
;)

brighter..x

2006-11-20T10:57:00.000Z

Off sick from work. Now there's a surprise. I feel a bit better mainly because I phoned a friend and talked about it. Put it in perspective. Winter's here, big changes in work, Spring being unwell, Fecking Christmas Nigh, stress, traffic and life. Collette said being Bi-Polar things that make me low have the risk of making me very low. She's right as always. She's ace.
Looking at yesterdays post I feel like I want to take it off but I won't because that's part of 'Living As Trinity'... Me and it's not fair to anyone who comes here looking at what life is and has been like for a Bi-Polar girl.
And to be completely fair... Life has been pretty good this year. I had lots of stuff to contend with but I have coped very well and been quite stable and happy. Have faith in me. I will overcome all. I think I got a bit of a bug, scratchy throat, headache, feel freezing cold... You know the usual crap. I had a mate who was ALWAYS ill over Christmas... Really unwell. Poor woman.
The kitten had her last jabs last week. She can go out in the garden tomorrow. We mentioned the tail sucking to the vet who said it was a comfort thing... But it really is very disturbing to see her sucking it and purring and the subsequent tail soggy look afterwards. It's disgraceful.
I spent a few hours at the Train Station yesterday. Made a beef stew for the workers. There was trouble at t'mill though. The police were there as some kids had broken into the catering coach and stolen cans of drink... Coke etc. Chocolate bars and crisps... On a bag of frozen chips. A box of tea bags.. Half used. They took it all up the track and made a fire and had a picnic. I have no idea what they thought they were going to do with frozen chips and tea bags. Anyways the fire was still lit when the track gang arrived for work and half the stuff was still there on the floor.
The police said it was a crime scene and we waiting for CSI to arrive. We thought we might not be able to open the coach till Tuesday... For a few cans?
The cops brought the unopened cans back and I sold two to Spring lol.
Eventually CSI could give no ETA so we reopened. I guess I'll need to restock the place now... Sigh.
Spring was very unwell all day. He looked dreadful. He wants to drive to Littlehampton next Sunday but after yesterday I'm not sure he'll cope with the long journey and day.

"Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad,
Other things just make you swear and curse,
When you're chewing life's gristle,
Don't grumble,
Give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life".

Monty Python (whistle)
You know someone bought me this single for my first wedding anniversary to tosser. I should have know from that very moment we were doomed.
I loves you all. Never forget it.

Heidi stealing Danz's breakfast. No, she's NOT allowed to do that.